Monday, July 31, 2017

4 second Zombie-Apocalypse Survivor Generator

Roll 4d6 and write each number down in order. Then roll 1d20. Congratulations, you've made a zombie apocalypse survivor in 4 seconds. 25,920 combinations.

Physical State
[1] Bone thin, wiry. Anemic but can squeeze into tight spaces.
[2] Body-builderesque. Can carry much more and very strong with melee weapons.
[3] Somehow still overweight. Bad cardio but +2 hitpoints.
[4] Old. Bad vision and hearing, but can feel a pain in their knees when zombies are coming.
[5] Missing an arm or leg. Immune to the disease.
[6] Average build. Has a weird birthmark or heterochromia.

Mental State
[1] Hyper-Focused. Seems to notice everything, on the verge of collapse.
[2] Paranoid. Gets to always go first in combat.
[3] Scientific and detached, coping mechanism. Knows a useful fact about machines or zombies.
[4] Doting and self-sacrificing. Heals others +1 HP when using health kits.
[5] Arrogant, Selfish. Wants to be “leader”. Can intimidate bandits and raiders.
[6] Depressed. Mopey, will kill self if bitten. 1 in 20 chance they become a hero at just the right time.

[1] Semi-Automatic handgun. Can reload on the move.
[2] Powertools. Can be used to build fortifications as well.
[3] Chainsaw. Massive damage, but needs gasoline.
[4] Fucking samurai sword. Breaks on an attack roll of 1.
[5] Makeshift shotgun made out of metal pipe. Can be used as bludgeon.
[6] Entire box of molotov cocktails.

Useful Item
[1] First aid kit.
[2] Gallon of gasoline.
[3] Box of ammo for the most convenient firearm.
[4] Flare gun.
[5] Medicine. Can be used to cure one normal disease or slow zombie virus for 1d6 days.
[6] Solar-powered pair of walkie-talkies.

[1] Hunting Enthusiast. Hunting Rifle with 2d6 bullets, can butcher and skin animals.
[2] Librarian or Lawyer. Has gold pocket watch, could be used for trade.
[3] Free Runner. Can lose anyone in chases and move quick through urban areas.
[4] Cop. Has bulletproof vest, pistol, and fighting skill. Convict gang wants them dead.
[5] Student. Fully charged laptop and phone.
[6] College dropout or hippie. Has magic mushrooms or marijuana & bong. Enough for 4 doses.
[7] Cashier. Gets +1 to reaction checks with other survivors.
[8] Rock-climber. Has lots of rope, climbing gloves, and no fear of heights.
[9] Motorcycle tough guy. Leather jacket gives +1 AC, switchblade. Motorcycle is ruined.
[10] Cowboy. Can tie things up at a distance and can break in wild horses as mounts.
[11] Janitor. Has a makeshift bomb made of cleaning supplies.
[12] Professional chef. Can make almost anything taste good, has a big ass cleaver.
[13] Hiker. Has a tent, bedroll, and can go for a long time without rest.
[14] Drunk bastard. Heals 1 hp the first drink he has each day.
[15] Greasemonkey. Good at fixing cars.
[16] Government official. Can flash ID to avoid getting killed by roving government death squads.
[17] Suburban stay at home parent. Can stitch up clothes.
[18] Creepy weirdo. If he rolls a 1 for damage against a zombie, he can reroll it.
[19] Zoo Keeper. 1 in 20 chance huge ass lion from zoo he treated nicely appears to save him.
[20] Fisherman. Can produce a ration from fishing and can drive boats.

Sunday, July 30, 2017

50 Ways to Prepare Spells

Wizard Hookah from [16]

50 Ways to Prepare Spells
For OSR Adventures

[1] You have a blank book you must spend time writing with your epiphanies and spiritual discoveries, as you get closer to enlightenment you get the power to change the world (spells). Every morning when you wake up you've forgotten everything and your book is blank again.

[2] Find some privacy and lay some eggs. Each egg is a spell, and you must merely hold it and allow the spell to be 'born forth' from the egg when you cast the spell. The larger, more colorful, and harder to lay the egg, the higher the spell's level.

[3] Two tiny beings, one an angel and the other a demon, appear on your shoulders and speak to you privately. As you promise good/bad deeds to them, they grant you your good/evil spells for the day.

[4] Excise your tumors every morning- you see them as they are, astral parasites that drain your magical and sexual prowess. The tumors themselves are not magical, but you have a compulsion to collect them in jars.

[5] Stick your face in the corner and think about what you've done. Your brooding thoughts form into spells in your mind.

[6] Tiny childish fairies visit you every morning and sell you your daily spells. You can only pay them in worthless beads and painted wooden chips, play money, but the negotiations are serious and can get really heated.

[7] You do not prepare spells. Instead you simply vomit up yesterday's spells- they exit your body as a faintly glowing rainbow puke that loses its shine as it cools. You must vomit up all the spells before you can cast any today.

[8] Strange game board that you set up each day, keeping the positions and moves from all the pieces from yesterday. You spend the entire preparation time moving one piece, and you memorize the board before packing it up again.

[9] Paint your hands, fingers, and fingernails with bright colors and strange ring designs. You ritualistically wash yesterday's paint off each morning you prepare your spells, then paint different colors and patterns back on.

[10] Box full of blind rats. You feed them and play with them each morning, but your eyes never leave their tails. The way they coil, wiggle, dance and snake about as the rats fight and play teach you secrets. To cast a 9th level spell you must cut off one of the rat's tails and throw it as a spell component.

[11] Old dice. You throw them down over and over again, looking for patterns in the numbers until you are satisfied. You swear like a sailor the entire time.

[12] Scarification. You make tiny cuts all over your body in strange designs and patterns, too shallow to cause any damage to hit points. When you cast your spells these self-inflicted wounds miraculously heal.

[13] The script of what happens later that day sits in your lap, and you giggle knowingly as you read ahead. You refuse to let anyone else see it.

[14] Polishing a single metal object for the entire preparation time, either a secret medallion/locket or creepily polishing your knife.

[15] Breathing and stretching exercises. Anyone who joins you without 15+ Dex and Con cannot keep up. If you lack the stats yourself you can somehow still do the exercise, much to everyone's amazement.

[16] Hookah. You spend the preparation time setting up, lighting, and enjoying an extremely elaborate hookah pipe. Once the embers go cold you are ready to adventure that day.

[17] Genie. You've tricked a genie into giving you unlimited wishes, but he tricked you back by making them extremely weak wishes. These are your daily spells.

[18] Seize up and convulse for the entire preparation time. You get offended if anyone shows concern or tries to help.

[19] Book of Butterflies. You have a book of preserved, flattened butterflies that come to life when you remove them from the pages. They float around you and die when you cast their spell. You make certain to carefully pick up their bodies and place them back in the book.

[20] Sleep. You still need your normal sleep in addition to preparation time. Days when you aren't working you easily sleep 16+ hours.

[21] Tantric masturbation.

[22] Set up an alter and pray to your strange foreign god. The other party members turn their back on you in disgust.

[23] Exotic Spices. You mix tiny amounts of rare and exotic spices and slip them in with your rations, even if that is just a tiny cracker.

[24] Debate with the wind, the tiles of the floor, your clothing, etc. You eventually browbeat the inanimate object into giving you your spells.

[25] Catch a rodent, frog, fish or big spider and swallow it whole. Every time you cast a spell it kicks in your belly. It takes the entire preparation time to catch and swallow the poor creature.

[26] Ritual Bathing. For practicality, you can use a damp cloth and a special brush, but you much prefer a stream or hot bath.

[27] Giant warts appear on your nose and you examine yourself in the mirror while they grow. Whenever you cast a spell one of the warts disappears.

[28] You must examine the map or if you don't have one scrawl your own in the sand or on a wall. You spend the entire preparation time trying to calculate the divine geometry of where you are, and prefer to cast your spells in the center of certain rooms or in small tucked alcoves.

[29] Ritual ceremony where you call upon the spirits to grant you your powers for the day. Requires several props that you carry with you and use for no other purpose.

[30] Tiny magic scrolls written with a single strand of hair. You can keep them up your sleeve or attach them to the brim of your hat so you can easily read them to cast your spells.

[31] Skull of your master. You study the skull and prepare spells from them, ala Phrenology.

[32] Bound demon appears from fire and gives you your daily spells in the form of a black grimoire which pages burn when cast. The demon is under a strict contract and cannot do anything but give you your spells, but it is hateful so it does it slowly (prep time) to spite you.

[33] Bag of Pebbles. You have a bag of tiny pebbles you count every day you want to prepare your spells. The number never changes but you need to count them fresh every day.

[34] Braid and knot your hair in very specific and arcane ways using your silver mirror. Whenever you cast a spell these untangle.

[35] Musical Instrument. You spend the entire preparation time quietly playing an unusual instrument, such as a sitar or paper organ.

[36] Write letters to heaven requesting your daily spells. You can mail them by simply throwing the letters down a hole or burning them, and receive spells in a shaft of light after a brief moment of deliberation among the Gods.

[37] Fastidiously clean the immediate area.

[38] Solve puzzle boxes to gain your spells. You collect the boxes but each day the puzzles reset and even randomly change their solutions.

[39] Peer into your seer's stone to maddening vistas. Anyone else looking in sees alien geometries and dark things, and cannot bare to look again. But you? You stare.

[40] Alchemy. Carefully mix together tiny amounts of ingredients into little crystal forms or tiny potion vials. These are your spells, but they have a short shelf life so use them today.

[41] Spend your preparation time knitting a scarf. Every time you cast a spell, the scarf gets a little shorter until it is gone with your last spell.

[42] Pot full of rare tropical frogs. Disembowel one and examine its entrails to gain your spells.

[43] Spellbook. You carry around a standard spellbook, but to prepare your spells you crawl into the book and wrestle with them in the astral realm. Nobody in the party can join you.

[44] Tinker with clockwork toys and devices. Each one, if properly calibrated, is a spell.

[45] Liquefy yourself into a puddle of goo. To stay safe, change in a pot or pan. Other party members need to be careful not to knock it over.

[46] Possessed by spirits. Every day you are assaulted by demons or other spirits that inhabit your body- you let them in willingly and in return they grant you dark powers.

[47] Age yourself to a decrepit geriatric then age backwards, using your new wisdom to cast spells. Every time you do this your 'base' age gets a bit older, you can't outrun time. Yet.

[48] Morning rituals of a dozen or more people; one for each of your many split personalities. Whenever you cast a spell one of the personalities takes over for a second.

[49] Puppets. You have a collection of puppets each dressed and shaped as famous characters from a famous play in the campaign setting. You voice and act out the entire play.

[50] Gag yourself and slavishly serve all the requests of the other party members. Once the the time is up you act as a proper Wizard again and will suffer no commands or disrespect.

Saturday, July 29, 2017

World Primers - 3 OSR Settings

Ever since I got into OSR style tabletop gaming, my appreciation of both rules and game design has grown. But in the tabletop gaming community that I have been in for a bit longer then that, I really enjoyed the worldbuilding aspects of the hobby. It's also one of the hardest parts of the hobby.

As experts will tell you; don't sit down and just worldbuild. It's better to discover or create the setting through play, fill out random tables and see what happens. Hell there is an implied setting based on the campaigns, rules, and monster encounters from the oldest of old school D&D. Even with that said though, I have a great love of creating interesting worlds.

However, unlike other people, I'll arrogantly declare that my method of creating the 'outline' of a setting is superior to the nitty gritty. I'm not too great with the details outside of play, I'd rather just make something very general with some interesting ideas, paint wide, and let the details fall into place, or let people imagine them themselves. This is more of a help to organize X content then anything else, that's essentially what these settings are. Generic fantasy ideas go in this setting, weird gonzo modern fantasy stuff go in this one, etc. Maybe you think this is a bad method of worldbuilding, or maybe you've never thought about it before. Either way.

As of right now, I have three primary settings that are focused around OSR style games. These are the ones I'm focusing on in terms of developing and creating content for, more or less, because I only create worlds for games and to set them in, not for the act of creating itself.

Atria(?) - Generic High Fantasy

The roads and wilds are dangerous places. Once the world was a formless place of creation and destruction, the Archons who inhabited it. As they danced and endlessly created and destroyed, a force called the Heku began to bind everything together in symbolic law, the wordless agreement on how things 'should' be. There was a great war between the Archons, who eventually split into Demons, Fae, the Gods, and other beings as well, greatly spent and weakened and fractured. The winner of the war was the Red God an evil God of control and power. The Gods created mortal beings, who could exist and live free under the Heku, not within it.

The mortal races change every other day I work on the setting, and mostly worship the Gods and other lawful Archons. The Red God is the darkest, most powerful God and ruler of all monsters. The Night of Sacrifice is one of his rules, and is core to the folk's beliefs, though not by choice. People live in small fortified villages and within carefully patrolled woodland areas; man must fight with the monstrous unknown constantly. Recovering treasure from dungeons is considered a great act; status and land and leadership are thrust upon those who prove themselves with steel, daring, or magic.

Recovering these stolen treasures from the Red God's children is the object of dungeon-delving. The people who dive them include three general classes. Dangerous include monsters, magic, cursed items, traps, and dying from boredom at this generic fantasy adventure-land.

Garden - Gonzo Modern Fantasy

Set in a city outside space and time, “Garden” as it has come to be called is the home of things lost and never found. Everyone came to Garden by accident. Long night driving on a forest road, and they suddenly ended up in an electric city in the trees. Depressed young people sometimes just wake up on its park benches- in a new city of opportunity. But once you're in Garden, you can never find your way home. The sun never comes out in Garden, it is a land of eternal night, but yet the native plants still grow. The darkness of the night hides terrifying monsters and the enigmatic members of the Torchlight society, insane men who prefer the woods to the calm electric lights of the city. Nobody knows where the power comes from.

Garden's level of technology is fiercely independent and anachronistic. People rumble around the city streets in tesla-coil powered hover cars but computer technology is essentially nonexistent. People fight with scrap metal weapons, called Chimneys, and without a true leader ruling the city it is essentially a libertarian anarchist paradise. As long as you got the money, the cars, and the guns you can control some of the city's neighborhoods; but nobody has united the whole thing. Garden itself is the only known place of safety and civilization in the dark alternate world it resides- its refugees from other worlds are alien and strange as well as human. Psychic powers awaken here, and those born in Garden have never known what the sun feels like.

Finding treasure and navigating gang territories are core to the gameplay. 'Sweeps', the slang term for adventurers due to the fact they tune their own guns and clear buildings floor by floor, use arsenals of weapons and some have psychic abilities. Dangers include mad psychics, weird technology and animals “imported” from other dimensions and lots of very mean people with guns.

Perfected Tyranny – Soft, Pulpy Science Fiction

In the vast oceans of space, the greatest minds of some long dead race or world came together to create the perfect form of government, the one thing that could keep biological life alive forever; they created Perfected Tyranny. The BICOs (Biological, Intelligent, Communal, Organism) had banded together to create the one thing that could protect them from the terror of the galaxy, the SICOs. (Solar, Intelligent, Communal, Organisms). SICO is pronounced 'psychos', and these faceless star beings hate all other forms of life, and so we went to war.

It is only through Perfected Tyranny or P.T. for short that the biological races can hope to wage war against such powerful energetic foes, and it is the only way for so many different races and worlds to be united. Using Hyperwave engines, you can create starships that travel many times faster then the speed of light, to explore the galaxy and to keep the peace between the BICOs. As best one can, anyway. Enforcers, space pirates, explorers, merchants, all exist and all swim the stars just to live, forever living in fear of the solar evil.

Going from planet to planet and achieving objectives, enforcing the law of PT or delving derelict ships and space stations are all goals that star explorers might go for. Those who ride the hyperwaves through the galaxy include a myriad of beings and backgrounds, scrabbling whatever technology they can. Dangers include depressurization, hostile worlds, alien tyrants, and light-beings read to cook you outside-in with their heat rays.

Friday, July 28, 2017

Wand & Staff Apperance Geneator

Here are some ways to make a random design or appearance for a magic wand or staff.

Wand & Staff Appearance Generator
Roll a Shaft, Handle, and Topper. For a staff, roll Shaft category twice instead of a Handle.

Shaft- d12
[1] Vertical grooves.
[2] Single continuous spiral carved into shaft, from top to bottom.
[3] Polished stones embedded in hexagonal slots.
[4] Dragon engraving circles all the way up.
[5] Unworked, pure material without smoothing.
[6] Single opal, swirling colors, embedded halfway up the shaft.
[7] Colorful painted rings, alternating up the staff.
[8] Several small charms hang down, tied with twine along the length.
[9] Leather straps nailed in to top and bottom, can be slung about your back like a holster.
[10] Splotched with darker stains.
[11] Metal studs along its length.
[12] Wrapped in fabric all the way down.

Handle- d12
[1] Engraved to imply the shaft is the horn of a unicorn or narwhal.
[2] Exotic animal fur for a grip.
[3] Made of an animal antler, mostly unworked except where it is joined to the shaft.
[4] Orb filled with colorful water as pommel.
[5] Wrapped in fabulous red dyed fabric.
[6] Clockwork music box built in. Turning the key plays a 4 note lullaby.
[7] Ergonomically designed. Shaft is curved.
[8] Has metal crossguard like a sword.
[9] Flowers engraved along base of shaft and bottom of the handle.
[10] Gold hilt-cap. Stamped with a face.
[11] Painted in bright and annoying colors.
[12] Extremely long, almost as long as shaft.

Topper- d20
[1] The head of some animal, like a wolf or owl.
[2] Wooden ball, polished to incredible shine.
[3] Tiny twig with impossibly still green leaf.
[4] Tip painted white. Glows in the dark.
[5] Very tip split in two prongs.
[6] Bead cord attached to end.
[7] Small length of chain wrapped around tip.
[8] Tiny carved house. An ant lives there.
[9] Opaque crystal of random color.
[10] Solidified orb of amber.
[11] Star stuck on end, like fairy godmother.
[12] Metal topper. Shaped like a finger.
[13] Shark bone fishhook.
[14] Raw ore splinter.
[15] Conductive. Occasional spark.
[16] Glass tip. Transparent.
[17] Tight spiral engraving.
[18] Metal ring few inches below apex.
[19] Tip cut off, sanded flat.
[20] Flickers soft, arcane light like an ember.

Thursday, July 27, 2017

50 Ways to Fluff Magic Missile

Ice-Balls from [44]

50 Ways to Fluff Magic Missile

[1] Your torch/lantern/light spell dims for a second and sputters hot sparks at the opponent.

[2] You throw a metal-tipped writing quill, which seeks soft flesh under armor and through defense.

[3] Conjure a swarm of tiny dragons, which bombard the enemy in tiny breath attacks.

[4] Spell has no outward effect. Target feels their internal organs wrestling and fighting each other for a moment until calm restored, deals damage.

[5] Pantomime an archer knocking and releasing an arrow. Target feels it as though it was real.

[6] Environmental damage. Fate makes the area around them hurt them; random objects will fall on the enemy, insects will bite, etc.

[7] Target punches themselves right in the face.

[8] The words of your spell invocation are minor words of death, pain, and damage.

[9] Nearby dust and smoke animate themselves and form a bubble over the enemy's face or turns into a small dust-devil slams into them.

[10] Random opening in enemy's clothes turns into a mouth and bites them. If a beast, their tail turns into a snake and bites their rear end.

[11] Enemy's eyes go bloodshot and they shed a few tears of blood; minor internal damage.

[12] Religious weapon of your character's religion flies out and hits foe spiritually. Examples include; flaming sword, stone hammer, dwarven god's axe, serpent god's dagger, etc.

[13] Poison toadstool-mushroom grow around enemy's feet and releases cloud of spores, dealing minor damage.

[14] An illusion of a much more powerful spell is cast, dealing only minor damage because it was only partially real.

[15] Your hair animates and whips the foe.

[16] Localized earthquake.

[17] Golden Orbs appear around your head, firing in a barrage. 1 Orb per point of damage.

[18] Powerful Static discharge leaps from your fingers at the enemy.

[19] Piece of the sky falls down on their head.

[20] Suck in a lot of air and breath it out instantly, buffeting the enemy with powerful gust of wind.

[21] Eye lasers.

[22] The weapon you are holding magically extends to be 30+ feet long, you attack with it.

[23] Angel comes down from the sky and starts listing off target's sins, dealing damage from the guilt. If the target is evil then it's a devil instead listing off all the times the target messed up and was nice instead of evil.

[24] Target has a vision of being lost in the woods for a number of days equal to the damage rolled. The damage from isolation and exposure carries over with them, but no time passes in reality.

[25] Famous character from a famous play in the setting appears and strikes the foe as fitting to the play (ie; Brutus stabs them)

[26] Nearby light source such as sun, moon, or torches focus their light into a laser beam.

[27] Spooky portal with lovecraftian tentacle attacks enemy.

[28] Powerful wave of water appears and strikes enemy, quickly evaporating.

[29] Green bolts of energy fly from under your clothing, striking enemy. They fade in color but return back under your robe or in your bag.

[30] Very minor Disintegration spell. Obliterates a finger sized hole in the enemy's body.

[31] Enemy catches a very nasty disease (leprosy), but cannot spread it and it fades over the next day.

[32] Blow air into your thumb and make a cartoonishly huge fist, smashing the enemy with it.

[33] Milky white streams of power come from you, hitting the enemy and turning their skin milk white until healed.

[34] Force choke.

[35] Summon a trio of extremely weak otherworldly entities like imps, they attack for a single round as best they can then disipate.

[36] Powerful heat wave singes the enemy's skin and lights a few stray hairs on fire.

[37] Fling a nearby object at the enemy with telekinetic force.

[38] Enemy's blood turns partially into water. Enough to deal a little damage, not enough to kill.

[39] Claw marks appear on the enemy's flesh, shaped as the Sorcerer's personal glyph.

[40] Colorful pops and explosions appear around the enemy, like fireworks.

[41] Black bolt of lightning. When it strikes the enemy their skeleton glows black and is visible through their skin until they heal the damage.

[42] Moss and Lichen grows on enemy's skin, sucking some nutrients. Only deals damage when conjured but must be scraped off.

[43] Spectral horse or bull appears and tramples enemy before disappearing.

[44] The air around them condenses several large bubbles of water, which freeze and pelt them with balls of ice.

[45] Tiny bone in enemy's body breaks painfully. Nose, toe, finger, etc.

[46] Enemy is forced to vomit up some of their breakfast, which you just made rot in their stomach.

[47] Mathematical equation which subtracts enemy's lifeforce by magical algebraic function.

[48] Fire a flaming screaming skull from your hands, exploding on contact with the enemy.

[49] Enemy is struck with an injury they will face far in the future, the fate that came true too early.

[50] Ghastly tendrils suck a portion of the enemy's soul energy out of their body.

Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Path of Exile-style crafting

Since Fall of Oriath is coming out soon, I've been in a really big Path of Exile style mood, and was thinking about how to do Path of Exile crafting in an OSR tabletop game. It's an idea I've had for a long time, but have only just now typed it up.

Normally I draw my own art for the blog, but when it comes to established series with their own very pretty art, I'll let them do the illustration. All images © Grinding Gear Games.

Can't wait to kill this guy.

Path of Exile Crafting
To imbue an item with power, you have to use an Orb. Orbs can only be found in dungeons, or maybe crafted by high level artificers. Assume the cost of an Orb in a market would be equal to the average costs of all the possible magical properties it could give, since it is random.

From most common to most rare;
Orb of Transmutation roll 1d6 on the relevant table.
Orb of Alteration let you reroll an Orb of Transmutation item.
Orb of Alchemy roll 1d10 on the table. If you get a 6 or less, roll another d6 and keep both effects.
Orb of Augmentation let you add another 1d6 effect on an Orb of Transmutation item.
Orb of Chance roll 1d12. On a 11 or 12, you swap to another random table with a 1d6.
Orb of Scouring removes all magic effects from an item, as well as curses.
Chaos Orb lets you reroll any item.
Exalted Orb roll 1d4+6 and add that effect to any item.


Random Element Table
[1] Fire
[2] Cold
[3] Lightning
[4] Poison

Random Effect Table
Each piece of gear has a different range of possibilities.

[1] +1 to hit
[2] Weapon stuns for 1 round when it rolls maximum damage
[3] Deals 1 damage of a random element on a hit.
[4] Weapon glows in dark places, equal to a candle. If this result twice it's as bright as a torch.
[5] Roll 19 or 20 on an attack, get an extra attack this round.
[6] Get +1 initiative with this weapon.
[7] Weapon die size is increased
[8] Weapon can be released from hand to animate and fight for you for 3 rounds. Once per day.
[9] This weapon stops enemies from regenerating or healing it without bed rest.
[10] Once per battle, this weapon can fire a ranged beam that deals 1d6 magic, no save.

Armors & Shields
[1] +1 AC
[2] Gear is 1 unit lighter.
[3] +1 to stealth when equipped.
[4] Armor or Shield is corrosion resistant. If result twice then its immune.
[5] +1 to all saving throws while equipped.
[6] When an enemy rolls a 1 to hit you, you get a free counter-attack.
[7] Maximum health increased by +2 while wearing this item.
[8] You take one less point of damage from basic attacks while equipped.
[9] Once per battle, you only take 1 damage from each source of damage until your next turn.
[10] Once per battle, you can blind an enemy for a round by reflecting light off the item. No save.

[1] You can speak one additional language while worn, determined when the item is first identified.
[2] Cast 1 additional first level spell a day. If you aren't a MU, you can cast Mage Hand once per day.
[3] You have 1 resistance to a random element.
[4] +1 Str, Dex, or Con modifier, determined randomly.
[5] +1 Int, Wis, or Cha modifier, determined randomly.
[6] Cast Turn Undead once more per day. If you aren't a Cleric, you can cast Sanctuary once a day.
[7] You are immune to Sleep and Charm.
[8] Once per day, reflect 50% of the damage enemy spell or attack deals to you back to them.
[9] Add +1 to Treasure rolls, or increase the amount of gold you find by +10%
[10] Once per day when you kill someone gruesomely, heal 1 HP. Item whispers to you.

Tuesday, July 25, 2017

50 Peddlers of Strange Wares

Fop Wizard from [12]

 50 Peddlers of Strange Wares

[1] Gazelle man, naked, runs across a field with a few tiny pouches. He only sells 1d4 items.

One of these items is a strange item; the horn of his mother, which grants +2 to the first save vs death the target takes. More then willing to sell it.

[2] The Sharpener. Sells multiple bladed weapons, has hundreds of whetstones. Loudly jingles.

Strange item is a whetstone which grants +1 to hit and damage and also makes a mundane sword count as magical until it dulls.

[3] Ghost Merchant. Sells ectoplasmic items that can be touched but not effect humans, still effects ghost. (ie; ghost sword can't hurt humans, but can hurt ghosts)

Strange item (even more then all his other items) is a Decanter of Spirit. Drinking the potion turns the drinker into a ghost for 1d6 hours.

[4] Obese pink-skinned man, hairless. Very clearly undergoing a transformation into something else. Wears a huge cloak with many pockets.

Strange item is a magic mask. While wearing it you are immune to fear effects, but you detect and are turned as though you are evil/chaotic.

[5] Scantily clad woman with several orcs under the effects of Charm spell carrying her bags. Her regular items include a lot of 1st level spell scrolls.

Strange item includes an Orc in a Jar. When opened it creates a regular, loyal 2HD orc armed with war axe and chainmail armor. Turns into ash after 5 Exploration turns.

[6] Voice echoes from a crack in the wall. Trade things by stuffing money into the crack, and receive them the same way. Lists all prices and items verbally.

Strange item is a magic cloak; grants +1 vs wands

[7] Snake charmer. Carries a magic flute and a basket filled with 1d6 poisonous snakes that he flings on people who try to rob him.

His special item is a 1d6 use 'universal anti-venom' drug. Cures any venom or poison.

[8] No legged man, scoots around on a silver disc. Somehow fights as well as a level 3 Fighter if angered. Has a backpack filled with useful items.

His strange item is a 3 legged cat, his pet, which he wishes to sell to a good home. The cat grants +1 save vs devices/traps if you take care of it.

[9] Strange woman with cogs on her head, says its to keep her brain pumping. She sells a number of high tech gadgets.

Her strange item is a zombie cog; Apply it to a dead person's head to make them into a zombie with the same personality and voice but mechanical motives and habits. They die again in 4 exploration turns and cannot be revived. 1 in 6 chance each time it is used for the zombie cog to stop functioning.

[10] Bundled up eskimo, regardless of how hot it is. Has many whale and seal rations and skins that can be used to patch up armor.

Strange item is the Cube of Vee. This item is unique in that, if it used, teleports up to 12 people down to the next 'floor' below them. It automatically finds a safe spot (ie; not in a wall or above lava) to drop everyone. The cube stays where it is on the above floor.

[11] Patrick the Witch-Man. He sells many potions in grimy drinking horns and metal cylinders along with a collection of curved knives.

His strange item is a Claw Talisman. The first time the character would be hit by a curse with this talisman, instead the curse is transferred to the talisman and has no effect on the character.

Anyone else who tries to steal the talisman from you gets the curse instead.

[12] Foppish, well dressed wizard duelist. Has mastered the arcane arts and now is looking for lessons in swordplay. If there is a Fighter above 3rd level in the party that can teach him some moves, he'll lower his prices by -50%.

Strange items; Sells Aegis Orbs. Tiny glass orbs with a tiny golden shield suspended inside. If broken grant +3 AC for 3 rounds. If thrown on a nearby ally it will grant them the extra AC as magical energies protect them. Has 3 Orbs.

[13] Halfling female, backpack overflowing with flowers and freshly plucked plants. If pressed, will reveal her backpack can keep them fresh forever.

Strange item is a Blasting Flower. Pluck a petal to cast magic missile (as though caster level 1). Has 8 petals. Deep purple color.

[14] Blind wolfman, gets around by smell enough alone. Has perfumed several of his weapons and items for easy use in the thick of combat, which he can do as well as a 5th level fighter.

Strange item is Dead Dog Tobacco. Despite dubious flavor it grants you an incredible sense of smell, like a bloodhound, for as long as you chew it. Lasts up to 10 exploration turns, but can be spit out and saved until later.

[15] Speaking Snake. Can only trade goods verbally; revealing hidden nooks and crannies with the goods, most of which have its children ready to bite thieves and those that don't pay.

Strange item is snake ball. Ball of snakes wrapped into an orb and put into stasis. Pull the one tail that is sticking out and throw it like a grenade; snakes bite and attack everyone nearby. Venomous.

[16] Blind and Deaf mystic; can perfectly understand common speech by feeling the vibrations in your chest and throat.

Special item is a seeking mirror. Speak the name of a named item and it will point towards it. When you find it, the mirror shatters.

[17] Mermaid, only accepts payment in pearls. Has many coral weapons and armors, as well as deep sea remedies and many fish rations.

Strange item; Ring of Waves. While wearing this ring you can activate it to animate a nearby body of water into a powerful tidal wave dealing 1d4 damage and stunning if it slams enemies into a wall, otherwise knocks back, drenches, and stuns enemies for a round. 1D6 uses.

[18] Assassin. Made a deal with Death to turn invisible, but only hunts immortal foes. Prices increase by +10% each elf in party. Sells thief tools and equipment.

Strange item; White Arrow. Counts as magic and deals +1d6 damage to immortal foes.

[19] Whispering Wine. Strange bottle of wine that can speak. If it agrees to make a trade some of it can be poured out onto the ground and it forms into the traded item. It can only trade 1d8 items before losing all its liquid.

Strange Item; Miniature bottle of spirit wine. If drunk by a someone who died less then 1d6 combat rounds ago it will revive them at 1 HP. Time limit of revival not known to the players.

[20] Friendly skeleton. Has a habit of popping out of closest or chests to spook party members. If pressed will reveal he was once a noble who got all his bones dipped in gold after he died. Buys and Sells jewelry.

Special item; Ruby Tiara. Grants a once daily laser-vision attack that deals 1d4 damage, deflected by shields. If it ever hits a mirror or deflected by a shiny sword the beam bounces back to the Tiara's jewel and ruins it.

[21] Rhinoceros Centaur. Bottom half rhino, upper half minus a big horn is human. Sells hides of extremely rare and powerful beasts its hunted.

Special Item; Magic Hyena pelt. You look like Hyena to other Hyenas, and beside dominance display roughness they won't try to kill you.

[22] Gladiator Fan! Sells memorabilia of famous gladiators, some centuries old but still household names. Sells tiny lead statues and toy weapons.

Special Item; Helmet of Hoolash the Blinder; blinded more men then anyone else! While wearing this helmet you cannot be blinded in the left eye, which includes temporary and permanent.

[23] Astral projection dragon. Random color, but always friendly and arrogant. Sells only advice for secrets in return. Advice includes such commodities such as 'how to get out of this hole before you die' and 'why I'm laughing at you for considering fighting what's in the next room'.

Special Item; Mental map of the area or dungeon floor, jot it down as fast as you can before it fades.

[24] Juggling Jester. Only sells one handed weapons and items, seems to have a lot more then he should be able to carry.

Special Item; Colorful smoke bombs. Acts like Color Spray for those caught in the center of at least 4 bombs at one time. Sells a pack of 1d12+3

[25] Raging Barbarian, off on his own. Will calm as soon as he sees you though, will trade his wild smoked meats and mastercrafted axes in return for being allowed to smash beautiful things.

Special Item; Ice Axe. Axe blade made from a glacier, never melts. Double damage vs fire elements and things weak to frost.

[26] Book Barterer. Pocketbook with unusual ability to absorb experiences written on its pages. In return grants common spells or drawings and information of nearby monsters. Seems to be controlled from outside source.

Each purchase costs 1d6x20 experience points, double for the special item.

Special Item; Spider Scribe Spell. Curse a target, the next time they open a scroll or spellbook a venomous spider will jump out to bite their hand.

[27] Pack of friendly normal looking dogs deliver notes and packages from around a nearby corner or door. Explains in the notes that 'he cannot interact with mortal men directly; so he has trained these dogs to do it'. If you run around the corner nobody is there.

Special Item; Vanishing Cream. When put on your skin acts as a limited chameleon effect, giving you +2 AC and a large bonus to stealth rolls. You're not invisible, just somewhat transparent. Only has 1 use, lasts until washed off or a full day.

[28] Mole man. Digs up from the ground, offering the spoils of the subterranean world.

Special Item; Dowsing rods. Hold one in each hand; they cross when over running water or buried treasure, max limit of 15ft deep.

[29] Tiger woman. If standing still, looks like a naked woman. If moving, looks like a tiger. If only part of her body moves, she looks a bit like both. Hard to tell where her parts end and the tiger begins. Savage, wishes to sell you rare perfumes from a far away land in return for masses of gold.

Special Item; Animal Attraction perfume. Makes you irresistible to the opposite sex, grants +2 to reaction checks against them. Not mentioned? Also makes you irresistible to tigers.

[30] Noble prince partying. Carried on a chair by his merry men, surrounded by several happy serfs. Doesn't matter where the party is, these guys saunter on through. Willing to trade a few useful items or weapons in exchange for more alcohol.

Special item; Sells you the title 'Lord of Wastille'. This title is totally worthless, as there is no manor of 'Wastille' that exists. However you are considered a 'lord' when it comes to magic and the law, even by people who know its not real.

Additionally, this title may grant you favor with the fae, who view titles as greater then deeds and names in the first place.

[31] Creepy group of kids. Seem to think and speak as though they have a hive mind, but don't admit it. Trade you useful items in return for marbles and candy.

Special Item; Doll's leg. Anyone who carries this leg and has their leg broken will wake up the next morning with their leg miraculously healed, but the doll leg shattered and useless.

[32] Literal snake oil salesmen. Most of his oil is worthless as actual snake oil, but he hints at a special 'deluxe' brand of oil, triple the price. If you buy from him or not you'll never see him again.

Special Item; Deluxe snake oil. If applied on a weapon or armor grants +1 for a single combat encounter, if put over a wound heals 1 hit point, rubbing it on your forehead grants +1 caster level for next spell cast, and drinking it grants +1 to all saves for the day. If you use it liberally, grants double the bonus at triple dosage. The bottle has 12 uses.

[33] Weird rat people. Conniving and seemingly evil, but have excellent respect for the art of the deal and business decorum. All sales are honorable, but final. No refunds.

Special Item; Boomerang Blade. Weird bent thing that deals 1d8 damage at range on a hit then returning to thrower safely. On a miss returns to thrower dealing 1d8 damage to them instead.

[34] Taxidermist. Travels on a wagon filled with stuffed animals and tools to make them. Doesn't have much to sell beyond his special item, but it is very expensive. Grants a 30% discount if you let him stuff a big kill your party made recently (at least HD 5).

Special Item; Vial of Tarnish-The-Past. If held to the head of a dead creature an a single moment in that creature's life is spoken allowed, vial fills with glowing fluid that, if drunk, allows the drinker to experience that moment as though they were that creature, added permanently to their memories. One use only.

[35] Quicksand elemental. Only an upper torso appearing in a pit of quicksand, warns people to keep back or be consumed by it. Has a trove of treasures and rare items from underneath its trap.

Special Item; Weird variant of a common MU spell. Ie; Frostball- as Fireball but with cold damage, Magic Missile that deals 1d6 per caster level damage vs undead, etc.

[36] Silver coin merchant. Wears gray robes, has two burly guards. Only trades in silver coins, even if gold or copper is more common in the setting.

Special Item; 1d6 'Lucky' coins. Flip them and receive +1 to your next save.

[37] Crossbow Expert. Sells, repairs, and trades crossbows of all kinds, including magical, repeating, and ornamental crossbows. Heavy mustache and foreign accent.

Special Item; Magical bow OR crossbow string. Glows gold in presence of abominations, +1 to hit and damage against them.

[38] Alchemist. Obsessed with creating original, pure forms of life. Promises not to use black magic despite his temptation.

Special Item; Wound Puddy. Insert into a wound to 'seal' it up with painless, flesh like puddy. Restores up to 1d6 HP temporarily, 10 exploration turns until it falls out and the wound returns. Can cause death if your health is too low when puddy fails.

[39] Traveling Monk. Aspires to physically perfect himself and spiritually perfect others- likes to recommend perfect religions for each person based on their traits even if they already have one.

Special Item; Thunderous Prayer-Wheel. If spun, this prayer wheel makes a single prayer sound as loud as 1000 prayers in the spiritual world.

Obviously this makes the prayer that much more noticeable to the Gods and spirits, but it has little effect on those Gods that are unwilling or unable to intervene normally.

[40] Sallela Soapbubble. Strange fairy that only appears inside of a bubble. If the bobble pops, she just vanishes. Mostly trades magical cosmetics in return for odd trinkets of your own.

Strange Item; Magic Soap. Cleanses your entire body and can be used on equipment to clean almost anything in one exploration turn. Has hundreds of uses, but like a regular soap bar it slowly gets smaller until used up.

[41] Mad Mage. Forever stuck ontop of a floating disc he conjured in an attempt to make a floating disc spell that can transport humans. Now, he can ONLY be transported by it. Can cast Floating Disc at will and has a caravan of invisible disks floating stuff around.

Special Item; Knife of Slickness this magic knife can, if used from where it was hidden on the body, strike a target and instantly return back to its hiding place. The split second attack would be hard for anyone to follow, especially in a crowd, and its a favored magic item of assassins.

[42] Collector. Different appearance, race, and gender each time you meet it, but the same entity. Collects all kinds of rare and strange items, sells nothing common and useful, but many weird and strange things.

Strange Item; Manticore Wand. Red painted wand carved from a manticore spike and ash wood for the handle. Any offensive spell cast by an MU using this has a 1 in 6 chance of being 'refunded' after casting, allowing them to cast it again.

[43] Medicine Man. Tribal gnoll with a bundle of herbs and plants, all useful for curing minor diseases, maladies and pains.

Strange Item; Red-Eye Root. Cutting this root into small slices and wedging it between the spaces in your teeth. Gives you +1 to hit and damage for 3 exploration turns. Can also be brewed into a tea that lets you ignore the symptoms of any diseases you are suffering from for 1d6 days. The root he sells is big enough for 3 uses.

[44] Fungus Man Trader. Sells several rare mushrooms, mostly useful as food, drugs, or medicinal uses.

Strange Item; Fungal Elixir. Glass bottle with stylish mushroom cap. If poured out onto the ground makes tiny edible mushrooms grow in 1d6 hours on that spot, as long as there is enough loose gravel or soil for them to grow in. The bottle has enough liquid to create 50 or so rations total, but they take time to grow and only grow in wet or dark places. If smashed and released all at once creates a miniature fungal forest with a million kinds of fungus everywhere.

[45] Warrior Princess. Sells a selection of armor, most of it secondhand. Polished by juice from the stars and possessing a wondrous shine.

Strange Item; Bouncing Bracelet. Grants +1 AC vs arrows and other ranged weapons. Secretly one of the gem's in this bracelet is a scrying jewel she uses to spy on people who buy the bracelet, 1 in 6 chance any day she'll try to steal it back at night.

[46] Warden of the Woods. Sells arrows and waterskins mostly, but hints at his special item from the moment conversation starts, to drive up its supposed price and value.

Strange Item; Pigeon in a box. Open it up to reveal a trained carrier pigeon every day. The pigeon disappears from the world and returns to the box every day, so it can only deliver messages within a day's range.

[47] Corpse Tenders. Pair, brother and sister, who try to give random dead people good burials. Sell basic goods cheaply, just trying to cover their expenses.

Strange Item; Coffin Powder. Dusting this over a coffin or sarcophagus calls back to whatever undead creature, vampire or mummy or whatever else calls it home.

The thing will usually return to stalking the waking world for 1d6 hours or until the next time it normally acts. Whichever is longer.

[48] Shellycoat Merchant. Boogeyman-like creature that appears by the sea, wears a filthy moldy cloak covered in chattering oysters. Speaks in clicks and moans.

Strange Item; Oyster Gel. Rub this on a living creature's skin to make them able to breath and move underwater, and become immune to oceanic pressure, for 3 exploration turns, 3 uses.

[49] Allad the Toymaker. Loves children and halflings alike, builds toys with nearly magical levels of decoration and motion when they are wound up and released on a floor.

Strange Item; Tobkins the Coin Cat. Tiny stuffed cat that, when pat on the head three times, will disappear when nobody is watching and return in 1d8 days, holding a silver coin in its mouth.

Each time after the first time it is used has a 1 in 6 chance of never coming home, possibly due to having a greedy owner.

[50] The Crusader. Broken arm and leg, still on his pilgrimage. Sells trophies of old enemies he's slain, mostly monster parts and demon horns.

Strange Item; Amber Talisman. Can be used once each full moon to Turn Undead as if the wearer was a Cleric equal level to his character level.