Showing posts with label clowns. Show all posts
Showing posts with label clowns. Show all posts

Monday, July 27, 2026

Makes Clowns a Race in your next Campaign

Original art @Ariel VH I think

There are a small set of character archetypes or "conditions" like vampirism or lycanthropy that can be attached to characters which keeps them human, but subtly different. Enough that they would still have "human" on their character sheet, but may have different abilities or a life that is significantly different from the other people in the same world. Much of these characters pathos comes from this separation they have with normal people; either a curse or blessing; and much time and energy is spent to examine them from their more human side or how they were before their change.

But you ever notice how nobody does this for clowns?

Superheros have alter-egos and their secret, civilian identities. Werewolves have their human form and the beast which they must keep in check. But clowns are just clowns. You notice how rarely we see clowns in media not in costume? We rarely examine their lives outside of when they are a clown. Even serious, scary clowns are only scary and serious because they are clowns. The only exceptions to this is the infamous Pagliacci and I guess Joker from Joker but not the Batman Joker who is a clown even in his off-time, where as Batman becomes Bruce Wayne. Just say it out loud to see what I mean; you can say Bob is a Human Fighter and he also got turned into a vampire. This is a sensible character concept. But if you say "Bob is a human fighter and he dressed like a clown" it wouldn't sound right. "Bob is a clown fighter" sounds better. Ergo, Clowns are a race.

Art @Poco

They Come From Clowntown
Clowns come from the big circus. Maybe it's a special flying city (or better, a city on stilts) where it's always in the carnival season. Maybe it's from the magical traveling circus where orphaned children end up, never to be seen again as they join the performers as new clowns. Maybe they're fully formed from the dreams and nightmares of the people of other races, which is why clowns sometimes have pointed ears or short and fat like a dwarf. Maybe they are just made normally with some very behind-closed-doors clown sex. Regardless, clowns live separate from the other races in the world. Their existence is magical in nature, as they don't really eat food the way other races do, instead eating emotions and attention. They don't worship the normal Gods; they worship the Fake God. It's not a false God, it's very real, it's just simply not a very serious one.

Clowns are roughly divided into two categories or subraces. Light and Dark.

Light Clowns are all about laughter, jokes, and traditional gags and pranks. They're very kindhearted and are often the butt of the joke. They fill a very supportive role both in comedy and in a party dynamic.

Dark Clowns are a bit edgy. They like darker humor, schadenfreude, and getting the last laugh. They are much more independent of the clowning types are more likely to take the lead from others instead of helping.

In traditional clowning, you could think of a Light clown as being the Auguste and the Dark Clown as more of the Whiteface clown; but the types are somewhat independent from alignment or role in comedy. Just think of the Light Clown as being the traditional clown and the Dark Clown as more of a jester or "badass" clown. Dropsy is a Light Clown, Shaco is a Dark Clown. Ronald McDonald is a Light Clown, Jester from Gauntlet or Darkest Dungeon and all horror clowns are basically all Dark Clowns. The girl clown from trying to get it ate? 100% Dark Clown.

While the Light Clown & Dark Clown dichotomy is very important in their society, it isn't necessarily an inborn trait. Clowns can switch between being light or dark, with some even getting stuck in the middle as a Mime. Mimes are like neutral alignment clowns but they also literally can't talk until they "find their voice" again. Most people assume it's a new joke when the clown in the party starts doing charades and dropping the colors from their outfit but no they're actually having an existential crisis until they figure out if they're gonna go Light side or Dark side again.

Clowns mostly stay in the circus or dream realm. This is where their food is most abundant, and where they can get up to their antics with less resistance from the other races. But sometimes, clowns are ejected from the big top and forced to go out into the world. Usually this is because they're not funny (if you never found clowns funny, it's because the funny ones don't get banished), but sometimes it's because they seek ancient knowledge; like the punchline to a forgotten ancestral joke or the recipe to the sherbet cream pie; which leaves a perfect rainbow of colors on people splatted in the face by it instead of the plain white that clownkind has settled for in the many centuries since this knowledge was lost.

See the difference?
Playing as Clowns
Ability Scores-
 Increase either Dexterity or Charisma by +2
Size & Speed- Medium & As Human
Alignment- Can be Good or Evil, but almost always Chaotic.
Languages- Common, Gobbledygook (Used by clowns and lawyers exclusively)
Skill Proficiencies- Perform & Acrobatics
Abilities- All Clowns have a nigh-infinite number of tricks they can perform. These can effortlessly entertain children and the simple minded, and can also be used to trick people, but essentially work as the spell Prestidigitation. If it's for anything important, then they can do it three times per day.

Then, depending on the type of Clown, they get a second ability.

Light Clowns get the ability to Slapstick. Whenever they fail a skill check or take a tumble, they can reduce the amount of damage taken to one point of damage maximum. This can only be used for out of combat scenarios or relatively low-risk engagements, like getting hit over the head with a bottle in a bar fight. Alternatively, a Light Clown can willingly take an enemy's attack, automatically allowing the attack to succeed without a To-Hit roll, but reduces the damage taken as though every attack die rolled was a one. This is always accompanied by a Gag; like getting hit on the head with a hammer and the clown falls down with a clang, but reveals a small anvil hidden under their hat.

Dark Clowns get the ability of Prank. Whenever someone fails an attack roll or skill check nearby them, the Dark Clown can reveal it was a prank and they caused it; granting them advantage on their next attack against that target. For example, a goblin desperately tries to steal your lantern from your hip to put it out before their ambush but fails. The Dark Clown reveals a very long hankerchief chain tying it around their waist, then coils the cloth around both hands and starts choking the goblin out with the colorful garrote wire. If this rule is too unusable, then instead Dark Clowns can just use Perform rolls in place of Attack or Stealth rolls for sneak attacks.

Clowns naturally take up roles like Bards, Rogues, and Artificers. Few Gods tolerate Clown followers and worshippers, and the Fake God has very little interest in worship, and so few are Clerics or Paladins. Despite their love of physical comedy, they make absolutely terrible Monks.

Tuesday, April 13, 2021

You start working in a Carnival + 10 Plot Hooks at the Carnival

The generic “you all start in a tavern” is a bit old hat. Some people skip this by just starting in the dungeon, or even in medias res if you know your group and you're actually good at DM'ing. But consider the following starting location: You all start as Carnies. Or traveling minstrels, whatever.


You are all carnival workers. You're all very poor. (Motivation for adventuring). And you travel around from place to place. (Letting you arrive in adventure locations and new modules; you just go where the carnival goes). All of you are also very skilled in specific things.

Look at your character's stats. Whatever stat is your highest stat, this is your normal “job”. Basing it on your class might be better, but most people pick their class based on their stats anyway.

Strength: Strongmen, bearded lady, the “gorilla”.

Dexterity: Jugglers, tightrope walkers, horse jumpers, knife throwers, etc.

Constitution: Sword swallower, fat lady, geek.

Intelligence: Fire breather, scam artists, stilt-walkers.

Wisdom: Lion tamer, fortune teller, clowns. (Makes sense if you think about it.)

Charisma: Hucksters, prostitutes, the ringmaster.

You need money. You aren't well liked, you lack social connections, and the only people you've got to watch your back are your friends. Combine this with a more rigid caste system or stratified society with little social mobility (like your standard middle ages fantasy world)- delving into dangerous tombs becomes one of the only ways for you to actually achieve something. If this be just for a bit of luxury, to help your carnival, or to try and escape this unfulfilling life.

Whenever you return from an adventure, you can take along a trophy that may act as a sideshow attraction. “Come one, come all, and see a REAL dragon skull!!!” You can even brag about being the one who killed it, though nobody will believe you. That's part of the fun.

Plot Hooks at the Carnival- Roll d10

[1] There's a kid who is really good at the dart game. Says he's practicing so he can take down the harpies at his uncle's farm.

[2] Some patrons at the sideshow are gawking at the fake mermaid skeleton. “Woah, that looks just like the thing down at Pirate's Cove!”

[3] One of your stilt walkers falls down in the middle of a performance. The bite in the wood does not look like any animal you've ever seen before.

[4] One of the tigers looks incredibly scared whenever its cage is exposed to the East.

[5] You patch up some holes for the big top when, in the middle of the night, a bunch of stirges rip through the patches and suck blood from a bunch of caged animals. They must have a nest a few hours from here. If you want to increase the stakes; the animals will die with continual feeding and you can't pack up the traveling show yet.

[6] The fortune teller at the carnival has a spasm and reveals they had a very real vision of something evil stirring underneath the ruins where the carnival has set up.

[7] Two clowns get into a fight at how to split a coin they got as a tip. When it is split directly down the middle; the two pieces magnetize back together and reform. This coin seems new, but the local mint that produced it has been abandoned for decades.

[8] The people in the carnival are starting to get sick from the water. The nearby stream has occasional streaks of black liquid and what appear to be bones floating down river.

[9] There is an orc, goblin, minotaur, or other demihuman/monster character who seeks refuge among the carnies. They say their group expelled them when they refused to serve a new dark master that has taken over- a dragon, lich, beholder, dark sorcerer, or some other large threat.

[10] The true heir to the throne accidentally reveals himself in an attraction. Maybe he smashes the strength test machine in a million pieces because the King's bloodline is super strong or whatever.