8 Powerful Enhancement Spells ended by Very Trivial Things

You could also called this "Eight Buff Spells" but some people get butthurt when you use video game terminology in tabletop games even when their origins are in tabletop in the first place.

[1] Mine Eyes of Iron
This spell turns the caster's eyes into iron balls, with no loss of sight or health. This spell has multiple effects. Firstly, the eyes become nearly immune to damage. Eye pokes, with weapons or fingers, become ineffective and no longer blind the Iron-Eyed target. Second, any flare or bright-light spells meant to blind the user of this spell instead have it reflect off the eyes and back at the caster who sent the spell. Finally, the "iron eyes" also refers to what you "see" with this spell. While your eyes are replaced with iron, scenes of depravity, torture, shocking violence, or even sanity draining effects have no effect. You can stare a Medusa or Basilisk straight in the face without being turned to stone or dying from it; your eyes are immune to their deadly magics.

This spell ends and the caster's eyes return to normal the next time the caster cries.

[2] Bulging Power
The caster or one target they touch instantly becomes morbidly obese for their species. This has the effect of raising their Constitution temporarily by +1d4 points, (in my game, higher CON grants bonuses to AC, so grant +1d2 AC to this spell as well if you don't) as well as increasing the elasticity of their equipment so it folds around their folds.

However, this weight is not the same as real, regular fat. Instead it is buoyant, nearly weightless for them, granting them a feeling of lightness. For everyone else, it's just as heavy as regular fat. They can step, run, or leap at almost the same speed and height as they could before, with all the momentum of a blubbery cannonball. Slamming into someone the same size as you or smaller now deals 1d3 damage and knocks them down. Also, while under the effect of this spell, you get +10% magic resistance - ignoring 1 out of every 10 spells, stacking with your other magic resistance if any.

The spell ends if you go one turn without eating a meal, or if you run for more then two or three rounds consecutively. Retreating from a battle will always end this spell early.

[3] Archaic Strength
The caster or one target gains a sudden surge of primeval strength. Their muscles pump up with powerful veins, hairy sprouts from their body, and their teeth and jaws become stronger. They physically shift to appear similarly to an ancestor might have in the distant past; humans will become like cavemen, birdpeople will look more like dinosaurs, etc.

While under the effect of this spell, the target treats their Strength modifier as +3 and can run, jump, and climb roughly 50% faster, higher, and better. They also gain some resistance to environmental extremes; turning a blazing desert into just a sunny day for them, and while wearing just rags or a loincloth they'll be as warm as a normal person wearing a heavy warm coat; but this has no effect on elemental magic.

This spell ends when the subject of the spell sleeps indoors OR consumes anything created as a result of agriculture and civilization. Meat and berries are fine; grains, bread, beer, potions, etc. are not.

[4] Sleeper's Ohel
This spell must be cast on a person who is asleep, or conjunction with Sleep on a willing target. Casting this spell this way uses up the prepared Sleep spell in addition to this one.

Once the sleeping person lays down, a magical structure is erected around them from local materials- iron, wood, and stone will all grow and twist to become a small building around the sleeping person. The building has the space to hold up to four other adult humans in terms of size, but is quite cramped. There are no windows and a simple stone doorway. The doorway is open to the air but covered in a layer of shadow- you can see out but nobody can see in. You can press up against the walls to have a 1 in 3 chance of avoiding anything being thrown or fired outside the tomb through the doorway. Additionally, damaging the Ohel from outside it will cause it to start to repair itself magically; it would take at least 3 people with crowbars or mining picks to break a wall down faster then it can fix itself.

While within the Ohel, the "sleeper" of the spell is immune to all opposing spells and is hidden from sight from magical abilities like sensing or scrying- the stone structure essentially become opaque even to magic eyes. Everything within the structure receives the same protection, as long as they remain within the Ohel. Nobody opposed to the sleeper is allowed may step foot within- and the sleeper is covered in a stone/metal/hardwood "casket" that protects them from enemy fire or attacks.

This spell ends when the Sleeper wakes up. It grants no special protection from noise or sensation; so a simple loud shout or sounds of a battle outside the Ohel can wake them up. If the Sleep spell was used in conjunction with this one, grant the Sleeper an unusually deep sleep equal to the normal duration of the sleep spell. When the spell ends, the Ohel remains upright but loses its magical power and self-repairing ability; essentially making it a tiny, rickety hut.

[5] Goat Mask of Magic & Satans
This spell requires a severed goat head, or at least dried goat skins and old goat horns, to be worn on the user's head when cast. The magic transforms the goat head into a well-fitting goat mask which does not block the user's vision or ability to cast spells. The mask is still clearly a mask, just very convincing.

While wearing the goat mask; the wearer gains powers of magic and satans. Spells involved with summoning demons, spells that deal damage, or spells that cause curses or hexes are all cast as though the caster is a level higher. Additionally, the goat mask wearer can perform a bleating noise that sounds just as a goat's cry; which acts as a "magic word" of activation for most magic items, secret doors, and so on. Finally, the goat mask wearer can tell if someone is evil or not just by looking at them; so if anyone CLAIMS to be a hardcore satan themself, you can tell. You can't tell if someone is neutral to good however, so a paladin would just look like an average dude, but you wouldn't mistake them for evil so heroes can sneak into your forest orgy.

This spell effect ends if the mask is pulled off or if anyone refers to you as anything other then "a satan", such as using a title or name of yours that they know. They can't just call you whatever they want but if they knew you were a bandit leader and using this power they could say "hey it's that bandit leader guy!" and the mask would dissolve because you aren't a cool Satan anymore.

[6] Soldier's Retribution
This spell is cast on a regiment of troops, not on an individual. The soldiers involved in the spell must all be present and willing for its casting- every soldier touches a piece of armor from a fallen comrade fighting for the same cause as they.

Once this spell is cast; any one of these soldiers struck down by an enemy causes a wave of weakness to spread throughout the enemy soldiers- causing them to feel more and more tired as though they had to fight twice as long and hard to kill as many of the blessed soldiers. For every hour of fighting against the blessed battalion, enemy troops are twice as weak or exhausted by the battling.

This spell can be countered by killing the regiment of troops with arrows or artillery.

[7] Dragon King Illusion
This spell is cast on the spellcaster, who must have a genuine piece of dragon bone to cast it. Fake or magically conjured dragon bones don't work- the spell functions but creates them as a hilariously stupid giant stuffed dragon. The "Dragon King" then balances the bone on their head while puffing up and shouting to maximize their presence. This spell consumes the bone and turns it do dust; with larger bones having longer duration.

Once this spell is cast; the caster appears as a towering bipedal dragon, anywhere from 20 to a mile in height- the amount of respect, worship, or fear that the viewer has for dragons determines how powerful or godly the Dragon King appears. This bipedal dragon appears regal, all-powerful, in a fine colorful mist with huge wings and a flaming crown. His voice can boom over an entire town, and can create massive images of fire or destruction. The dragon king's presence is so great that it can even force dragons to pause and stop fighting or force them to listen what he says.

This spell is a pure illusion and is a bubble made of smoke and mist. If an arrow directly strikes the Dragon King's phantasmal body it is destroyed and the spell ended.

[8] Cannoneer's Cant
This spell can be cast on two separate people; the caster putting their hand on each while whispering the incantations. The spell can also be cast on a caster and another person, though the spell must always be cast on two people. Usually, it is cast by a pirate mage on their two best gunners.

Once cast; the spell allows both under its effect to speak in a very precise, quiet, incomprehensible language of pure math, measurements, wind speeds, knots, and powder weights. These two will be able to flawlessly communicate and bolster each other's ability with cannons and ship-weapons. Increase the accuracy with cannons as though firing with advantage, always using the better of the two's dexterity or other scores as a modifier. They also attack faster; if in nautical combat a cannon can only fire once every other round, this allows them to fire once every round, and so on.

This spell ends the moment anyone says anything to them other then something directly related to firing a cannon at something. Like "look out there's a pirate behind you!".

Blatant Fetish Posting- Genderbending Kobolds

When it comes to fantasy worlds, I think exploring non-human races and cultures is very interesting- biology and magical/supernatural elements means these beings can be very different from our baseline "human" experience, which adds both roleplaying potential as well as game potential for things like rules and background for a game world.

Recently, in some modern D&D lore supplements, the idea of Kobolds being able to switch gender was introduced. This, in my mind, was a very interesting way to make kobolds distinct from other races and humans, and actually makes a lot of sense given the setting- I always imagined kobolds being a bit androgynous in the first place, both in terms of height/strength/looks so it fits that it wouldn't be too destructive or difficult to accomplish in terms of a biological transformation. (I've even written about this before) Kobolds are usually depicted as a bit more lizard-like, who are much more capable of performing a transformation like that compared to a mammal. Kobolds are also often depicted as being highly communal, and the importance of the individual is usually placed underneath the importance of the tribe- both of these would also make sense as cultural elements of a species who can shift and change sex. You give up your own original identity for one that keeps the population of the tribe going even after a disaster. And that final element also ties into it- Kobolds are weak. They are minions or sometimes food for greater monsters, and they die a lot. Evolution shows that creatures with short life expectancy tend to have lots of babies, it's a more r selected species on the sliding scale of quantity and quality.

This leads a lot of doors to potential for interesting character development. My favorite interpretation of this is that it is not a willing or choice to transform, it happens naturally. If you play as a male kobold in a party of mostly male adventurers, your kobold will turn into a girl. It isn't some weird sex thing either, simply being in the presence of males means there is more testosterone in the air then estrogen- this triggers the change to begin. For the character itself; this could lead down a lot of interesting roads. Perhaps they don't really care about the transformation at all, it's a normal part of life for them. Maybe the character is angry or lashes out against these changes, especially if they were raised in a society where the innate ability to change sexes isn't normal, leading to drama.

But there's a bit of a problem with this. Let's get real. There is a group of people, we'll call them those people, who have those politics. If you can't handle spicy political opinions, don't read on.

Is this a boy or a girl?
Art @ecmajor (VERY NSFW)

Basically, some people like the idea of gender shifting or changing stuff in fantasy as a form of wish fulfillment, or worse yet, a intentional political addition. These are inane opinions. But the idea behind genderbending kobolds is still cool- but it doesn't have any bite to it.

See, in my opinion, switching your sex is a big deal. Even in fantasy where magic can be easy or painless; there are so many knock on effects to sex. Sex is an inherent part of what people are; and while most RPGs and video games making a character's sex a purely cosmetic choice, in the fantasy milieu it doesn't really need to be this way. I would find it much more interesting if a character changing sex was a profound thing that really messed up their whole life- and part of this is the fact that kobolds are a bit too androgynous for this to work!

Imagine if you, a female creature, spent your entire life and career as a ammoral vagabond that goes into tombs and explores around as an adventurer. You are skilled at picking locks and mending wounds. Suddenly you begin to bulk up, growing taller and less able to fit into small places. Your hands grow large and hairy and so unsanitary; fingers that once wrapped bandages around your wounded allies are now replaced with large digging and fighting claws- used by males of your species to compete for mates. Suddenly you find your attention span greatly sapped, finding the careful craft of making medicines or repairing machinery impossible or very very difficult. It's a profound part of a character that changes everything, in how they dress and act and are viewed by their society. To simply chalk it up as an "oopsie you're a girl now! :^) " with no mechanical or roleplaying depth makes it nothing more then a pointless cosmetic choice that means nothing.

Garden District- The Sunk

The Sunk is a district of Garden half buried in a massive sinkhole. The sunk was once a pretty quiet, generic little district of the nightlight city until a massive earthquake caved it in. The sunk's lonely buildings still stand there, sticking out of the pit at odd angels. Even stranger, people still live in some parts of this district, many of whom were original residents refusing to move. The Sunk is by far one of the darkest parts of the city once you go past the last few illuminated streets, but even stranger how you'll see the occasional light on, pouring in through the window of one of those long abandoned highrises; who could possibly be up there?

The sunk is very dangerous, but all of its old buildings are still ripe for the plundering. There's a feeling of a “gold rush” in this part of the city, as though the sweeps are coming in to make their fortunes digging through the monster infested crumbled structures. Many of the local residents despise them in equal parts to loving the business they bring. Several inns, armor and weapon outfitters, suppliers, and gun smiths have set up shop in these neighborhoods looking to equip any urban explorers. The ones who make it back do so with loot underarm, empty magazines, and usually a few members missing.

Residents
The Sunk's residents are a pretty diverse bunch, with few races dominating the makeup. The “old blood” of this town are mostly larger, stronger people. The gray skinned rhinoceros people, the stone-flaked Gravelkin, and the heavy handed Manosians are common sights along the slanted central streets. The kids here are a lot more diverse, with many of them playing in the streets until one of them drops a ball, rolling it into the blackness beyond the last lamppost, and having to go in for the night. None of them will dare brave the darkness.

Despite its looks, the Sunk has become a wealthy part of town due to the treasure scrapping business and the various stores that supply the sweeps. This extreme influx has wealth despite the cracked and crumbling exterior of this place lead to strange sights; a newly chromed hover-car sitting atop a dilapidated lawn. Women dressed in the finest fashions visible through cracked windows. This is also evident in the huge amount of firepower the Sunk's residents have invested in. Scan the rooftops of this district to see many dusty hatted men, sitting up on the rafters of the various buildings armed with rifles, vigilant against the creatures in the dark just down the block.

Notable Characters – Roll 1d4

[1] Octopus Jones – 8 HP, 1 Armor, 2d10 sniper rifles

Large orange octopus man with two heads. Assures everyone that the second head is of the same consciousness as him, it's not two separate people, the bottom one can't even talk. Spends much of his time on the roof of Milk Tower, the tallest straight-standing building in the sunk. Use 1 Clout with him and he'll help watch your back with his rifles while you explore the Sunk.

[2] Joja “Swamp” Mancy – 14 HP, 2 Armor, 1d6 snub-pocket shotgun

Crocodile-like person with a big fat belly and a straw hat from his homeworld. Sulks around the basements and service tunnels of the sunk, trying to map what areas have been cut off or opened up by the old sinkhole, notifies enforcers of any strange activity. Secretly loves bubblebaths and has a collection of salts and soaps; will buy at top dollar.

[3] Iota – 12 HP, 1 Armor, 1d8 sawblade sword, 1d4 needle-nosed pocket pistol

Broad shouldered blue person with a tiny, triangular head. Not a fan of of the looters that are constantly coming into his neighborhood, but can be won over by those with spirit and who aren't totally self centered. He wants to reclaim the sunk one block at a time by putting up lights and getting construction crews to help rebuild the old crumbling buildings. Doesn't have any money to accomplish this.

[4] Fernad Blackshoe – 6 HP, 1 armor, 1d6 drum-loaded submachine gun

Keeps his gun under the counter. Looks more or less like a human but with huge black-club like feet and a more round face. One of the main shopkeepers of the area, selling guns, ammo, lights, medical items, food, and all kinds of other useful supplies. Desires one of the more weird creatures of the Sunk to be captured and sold back to him, which he hints at in conversations. Underpays for them.

Notable Gang – Black Dandies

Manpower- 4
Holdings- Outcasts (-2)

There are thousands of tiny, insignificant gangs in Garden. The black dandies, even among them, are an outlier for living more or less seperated from the rest of the city. Many of their number are made up by infamous bookies who owe everyone money, crazy conspiracy-theorists, and urban survivalists. They are extremely mysterious and don't let anyone into their group they don't know. Someone within their gang has the ability to build and/or maintain clockwork weapons, that work much the same as a regular chimney but that make a distinct clicking noise as they ready up for combat.

The black dandies rarely use subterfuge or live among the normal population, only having a few helpers/informants to help buy necessities. As such, their grip is tenuous.

Their leader is Enjuaro, who wears a black mask with black feathers naturally growing from his slender, avian head. Prefers to swordfight people over shooting them, but still mostly relies on his clockwork rifle (+2 to hit, cartridges)

Notable Location – Black Hole

Each district of Garden has a location that is attractive to sweeps- a notable location is a dungeon or place of urban exploration with great riches or mystery within. The black hole is no exception. This hole is near the center of the crater'd district and opened up at what was once a public park. The hole is very dangerous, as the earth nearby it is likely to give way and various monsters congregate or crawl out every so often. The only way to enter is to tie a rope around a nearby structure or support and rappel down 45 ft into a pitch black cave system; the only light coming from the clean-cut openings to the white service tunnels far overhead.

Random Encounters in the Sunk - 1d10

[1] Random bullet ricochets inches from your foot- one of the snipers mistook you for a monster. 1 in 10 chance that they'll follow up with a better aimed shot.

[2] You hear clanging and scrapping along a nearby overturned building. It's 1d6 Hookmen, dangling upside down and looking for prey like yourself.

Hookmen (2 HD, 1 armor and +2 defense when hanging, 1d6 melee rusted hook-hands, can climb)

These creatures look barely like a humanoid race, but with long narrow metal mouths rusted shut. Instead they attack with their hook-hands, seeking to pierce flesh. They inhabit the Sunk and scratch strangely shaped marks, almost resembling letters, into the brickwork of the rubble.

[3] Snappy dresser handing out permits to scavenge through the ruins, he demands $50 for each person in your party. It's total bullshit, but you'll get +1 to the first reaction check where you pull out the permits and insist you have permission to intelligent characters.

[4] Group of looters, digging through the bricks for pots, pans, and other valuable salvage. There are 1d6 of them, and they are armed with random firearms. Roll reaction check if your party is carrying a large valuable item to see if they try to mug you for it.

[5] Broken foundation reveals an unnaturally dark spot, which moves like a blob. It attacks if you shine light on it for more then a few seconds.

Dark Cloud (3 HD, only takes 1 damage from muzzle flashes, no defense roll or armor, takes damage from light, deals 1d6 psychic stress damage each round to everyone in it; then deals 1d4 regular damage to hit points for those passed out from stress)

[6] 1d8 Black Dandies (1 HD, +1 armor, 1d6+1 thick barreled clockwork pistol) Mysterious group of squatters, searching for loot in the ruins. Wear strange old style outfits and use clockwork guns, which function the same as the scrappy oily guns the rest of you yucks use.

[7] 1d4 Kangaroo Spiders (2 HD, +1 armor, 1d6 kick and 1d4 bites with kick venom. If kicked after getting kick venom you explode backwards into a wall and take 1d12 damage) Large hairy brown spiders that rest on huge kangaroo type legs. Their venom makes whoever suffers from it take massive damage from the next blunt impact they take; usually from the spiders massive legs.

[8] Nearby the sound of glass breaking and crunching can be heard. High up on one of the dark and dilapidated buildings are 2d10 Glass Lemurs, who will leave the party alone as long as they don't shoot at them or break any glass. These Lemurs eat glass, and have several injection sites along their rear as well as scars on their bellies as though they were subject to experimentation.

Glass Lemurs (1 HD, 1d4 glass shard spit, on death deal 1d4 damage to all adjacent from exploding glass filled stomach, if they fall they also explode like this when they hit the ground)

[9] Roll on General Gang Table.

[10] Roll on General Encounters Table.

Glove of Tanner

Glove of Tanner - +1 Magic Glove
Stats- +1 AC

This is a magic glove. It's made of leather, roughly stitched. This glove is infused with a sort of sense of regal humility, a down to earth honesty, and tried-and-trueness that makes it a reliable piece of equipment, despite its appearance. Despite only being made of leather and only being a single glove; grants +1 AC as long as you have it on your hand.

The glove provides two effects. The first is that if you physically touch a humanoid being with it during a reaction check (handshake, clap on the shoulder, etc.) the reaction check cannot roll a result lower then a 7 or neutral reaction.

The second is that the glove provides +1 To-Hit with all one handed weapons or daggers held in the hand. It is not two gloves, just one, and it is a left glove.

Anten the Murderer

Anten is a murderer. He has killed three hundred and twelve people. He's done these killings over the last ninety eight years. He's also been executed for his crimes five times.

Anten is a seemingly normal human. He is moderately charming (+1 Charisma modifier) but average in every other way. Set all of his stats to 10. Anyone with a Wisdom modifier of +1 or greater can tell there is something "wrong" with him. Anten prefers to lure his victims away, and then kill them. Anten prefer victims smaller and weaker then himself; usually killing women, or children, though occasionally he will kill travelers or drunkards. Not included in his body count are the large number of stray animals, livestock, and pets he has also killed. Worst of all, none of Anten's abilities seem to revolve around his killing in any way. His apparent immortality, as well as skill with magic, have seemingly nothing to do with his murderous appetite. As far as everyone can tell, he just does it because he enjoys it.

Anten (3 HD, +2 to hit, 1d4+1 knife attack, spells)
Morale- 8 in the open, 11 in Lair

Anten the Immortal
Unlike many others beings with immortality, Anten's doesn't give him youth or any kind of special supernatural resistance to anything. He's a regular human who can be killed by anything a human could be killed by- the problem is he comes back.

Whenever Anten is killed, whoever killed him begins to experience delusions, antisocial behavior, and becomes more and more isolated and irritable. The strongest willed can last many years, but eventually, they go out and kill just like Anten did. They chop apart their victims into pieces, and eventually, they turn into Anten. This isn't like a sudden or instant physical transformation, its just something that happens. Eventually the person is gone and Anten is back, leaving behind no body or trace of the unfortunate host.

In an attempt to circumvent his ability to come back; the last time Anten was executed, he was bricked into a stone tomb with plenty of water but no food, so he would slowly starve to death as his punishment. He complained quite a bit about that, saying its "less fun this way", but it seemed to work for a while. Until one day, the mason who bricked Mason in smashed his wife's head in with a brick, and soon he was gone, and Anten returned.

It is believed that, perhaps, a being of incredible will and of moral good nature could slay Anten and if they were to die of old age he would be gone for good. Nobody knows what would happen if someone were to kill themselves or be killed by another after ending Anten; but it is believed that any violent death can return him back to life. This includes the PCs, of course.

Anten's Magic
Beyond his uncanny ability to return to life, Anten is also a magician. He only knows a handful of basic spells any Wizard may know, but also has invented a few of his own which aid him in spellcasting. As Anten is not known as an especially powerful magician, he can cast up to three spells a day, but casts every spell as though he was a caster-level lower then he is, meaning his spells are more easily countered and resisted. Secondly, all of his home made spells are designed poorly and weak; and require the supernatural energy of a lair to function.

For the purposes of Anten's spells, a lair is any place where the spell-caster has murdered someone in cold blood. Their body must be hacked apart into pieces and spread apart to the four corners of the room; just like how Anten does it. Each killing can add about a room or 20 feet worth of area to your "lair" space, which essentially grows more powerful the more kills are done there.

You can learn Anten's spells, if you were to somehow help him escape or evade the law. Some Wizards may also be able to read these spells out of Anten's skull after he is killed, but will likely be infected by his evil and be replaced like him at some point once corrupted by his taint.

Anten's Spells - Roll 1d4 for a random spell
[1] Anatomical Dummy - 1st level
This spell is a minor necromantic ability. If it wasn't for the fact that Anten is a poor magician, this could be used like a level 1 cantrip for any skilled necromancer.

This spell allows a corpse to be posed and stand on its own power, much like a dummy or mannequin. It's similar to an animate dead spell, but grants the body no intelligence or ability to move, just enough to support its own weight. The more full and complete the corpse is, the more stable it is on its feet. Corpses missing several body parts or with hollowed out body cavities can be shoved over with a stiff push, but fully corpses with only minor injuries take a powerful weapon hit to knock to the floor, ending the spell.

Anten sometimes decorates his lairs with several standing dummies, especially around the chair, bed, or table where he straps his victims, as though an audience for his activities.

[2] True Cut - 1st level
This spells makes a knife or short-bladed weapon act as a +1 magic weapon for a single cut or attack. This adds +1 to hit and damage like a normal magic weapon, and is not consumed until it hits a target. It cuts straight and true, leaving a very clean, surgical slice. Anten doesn't know or hasn't been able to learn more common spells that are similar to this one, but better. 

Perhaps unintentionally, the energies infused into a blade or blade-point by this spell can be used to leave magic marks into whatever is cut, as long as its done in a single "cut" or long stroke. You could scratch your name in cursive on a wall, or your wizard's mark, for instance.

[3] Freeze Grasp - 1st level
This spell is intended to pin down and bind victims when more reliable restraints are not available. It requires a melee to-hit roll with an open palm. The caster must slam or push a target's body part into a solid object or surface. When successful, the spell creates a small frozen patch of ice, as though wetness was present and rapidly froze when the two bodies collided. So if you took someone's hand and slammed it into a wall with your own hand, the back of their hand would suddenly be frozen to the wall, as though glued on with ice.

By struggling free for one round, you can pull yourself away, leaving behind a small amount of clothing or skin on the surface you were stuck to. The ice will also melt after one exploration turn, unless in a place that's below freezing in temperature to being with. Also, any fire spells or warm water can be used on the ice to melt it away prematurely.

[4] Body-Burn - 2nd level
When cast, this spell creates a magical blood-red flame that grows fast and only consumes corpses. It will follow trails of flood or entrails like a fuse or line of gasoline. When it reaches a body part, it rapidly consumes it and explodes. Small body parts like hands or feed deal one damage, where as a full corpse would deal 1d4 damage to everyone adjacent. Large piles of corpses (or a room full of Anatomical Dummies) would likely deal Fireball levels of damage, consuming the corpses. However, nothing harmed by this spell will actually burn unless they were killed by it, just an explosion of heat and force.

This spell is Anten's most powerful creation, something he made to destroy large amounts of evidence if he needed to. Even after casting it, he gets winded and loses -2 to his AC for the rest of the combat encounter, as though drained of something fundamental to his being. More experienced spellcasters will not have this problem when casting the spell.

Dragon's Lair is a pretty cool dungeon

Dragon's Lair was an arcade game which made use of full cartoon animation where the player was required to make inputs at the right time to overcome multiple obstacles. It's most notable for being a classic arcade game that doesn't use pixel graphics, having art and animation by Don Bluth, and being very fantasy inspired. I'm assuming this game had quite a bit of D&D inspiration, considering that it came out in 1983, but that was a decade before I was even born, so who knows.

The game itself is a bit of an obscure relic, but since its basically just a cartoon with button prompts you can watch the whole thing on Youtube. Watching it now, you can still enjoy the charming animations and all the death scenes, which are pretty fun. (There's a lot).

However, why am I telling you this? Because the actual dungeon presenting in Dragons' Lair is pretty cool. I decided to stat it up a bit.

Purple Eyestalk Water Monster (3 HD, +3 to hit, constriction)
This monsters lives in water, and attacks prey above. It sees through green eyeballs at the end of each of its many eyestalks- which double as its tentacles. It doesn't attack except through dragging prey underwater. For each "hit", count it as having wrapped a tentacle around you, which gives you a -1 to your Strength modifier for all rolls or challenges to break free.

Drink Me
The infamous magic potion. It doesn't do anything cool like shrink you down, Dirk just like flashes green when he drinks it and explodes into dust. Kinda lame. Still- cursed magic potion, drink it is an instant death. Perhaps you could interpret the sign as a sort of magical persuasion- save to avoid drinking the deathly potion.

Snake (Stats as Giant Snake)
While generic giant snakes are nothing new, I would like to say I like the coloration here. They seem to be a combination of the very venomous coral snake (red touch yellow) and the nonvenemous scarlet king snake (red touch black) based on its coloration; but they only kill Dirk by constriction in the death scene. I also like how they come out of the bricks to attack; that's a fun combat element to spice up an otherwise unremarkable encounter.

Slime Claptrap (2+1 HD, Big-Bite at 1d8, trapping tongue, surprise)
This creature can appear from slime or ooze that is spilled or found in a random room or area. As such, it's body is very misleading. The claptrap opens its mouth very wide when it appears, also making it hard to tell exactly if something is about to attack you when it does appear. For both these reasons, you must roll for surprise whenever you encounter it.

The claptrap's mouth is very big and can slam down with great force; but it's slow. You can step away or attack its body before it can slam shut. In order to help it trap prey, it has a prehensile, sticky tongue that requires a save to avoid- if the tongue hits you you can't move back and must attack or be eaten by the creature. But because this creature is made of slime, it can be broken apart in a single strong attack; any blow that deals 6 damage or more knocks the creature back into slime.

Big Yellow Smoke-Electric Monster (3 HD, +2 To-Hit, casts Shocking Grasp to attack, smoke)
This monster is made of smoke and seems electrically charged. It attacks by using Shocking Grasp, which is an at-will ability it possesses. Technically Dirk kills this in a single hit, but he does that for everything and when he "defeats" it in Dragon's Lair it actually just shoves it back into the cauldron it came from with the heavy metal lid back on; perhaps this monster is quite a bit tougher but can be locked away back in its cauldron by covering it. Good puzzle-monster.

Hazards
I don't want to try to create stats or anything for these, since there are a lot of them. Some interesting ideas here though- the castle crumbles behind Dirk as he explores. Now in an actual game, exploring a dungeon that is slowly falling apart is a fun idea, but probably should be on the timescale or days, or at the very least hours, as to give the party plenty of time to react and send out expeditions.

One example in particular I do like from Dragon's Lair is the boat section, which includes "Ye Boulders, Ye Rapids, and Ye Whirlpools". I like the idea of a boat or paddling based saving throw you might have to make in a game, probably just a generic saving throw by modified by Strength. I think this is fun because the vast majority of "movement" related checks or evasion is based on Dexteirty, but in this case it's how hard you can paddle.

Giant Balls
This trap are several large perpetual motion machines along a long U shaped corridor. When someone enters one side, they will be chased by a giant black ball. The balls have to be run past at the right time, but fast enough to avoid getting crushed by the giant black ball. This would probably be a simple saving throw, or a dexterity challenge. Perhaps any character could accomplish it- unless if they're over encumbered. I'd say getting crushed by the giant ball is a sure death, but these small balls just deal significant damage but knock you to the floor which makes it harder to escape from the large ball.

Spinning Sticks + Spike-Pit Trap
These are pretty simple. Just sticks that spin around and knock you into pit traps. In Dragon's Lair its a matter of timing, I like to think that in a tabletop game you could replicate this by giving the player a choice- they can rush through and get a hard save, wait a round to watch the pattern and get an easier save, or wait 2 turns and/or be unencumbered to not have to save at all. Having them be pelted by ranged enemies and spells during this time would make it much more interesting. If you fall in you'd probably just die as by OSR styling, or take like 4d6 or something big like that.

Much more interesting then the trap itself is the enemy at the end of it.

Red Death (4+2 HD, +2 To-Hit & AC, Undead, Scythe of Disintegration 1d8+2, Flying, Enchanted)
The Red Death is a wraith. While it is clearly a ghostly spirit it isn't ethereal (because Dirk can hit it with his normal sword), but it's floating around and stuff, so I'd say its "body" is probably its signature red cloak.

Also, this creature uses a magic Scythe that destroys Dirk in one hit. Dirk dies to everything in one hit in this game, so I'd imagine is probably first level and has 1 Hit Point (unlucky roll on his first hit die, probably!) I'd say this Scythe is a minor +2 magic weapon; capable of killing any creature it hits in a single hit if that creature has 2 HD or less; otherwise, it just deals 1d8+2 damage. Additionally, when this creature is slain, it advances the Black Briars enchantment one stage.

Black Briars
It's not easy to tell if these are related to the Red Death creature in some way, or perhaps just a dungeon trap or hazard. I like to think that the Red Death is its own entity but has been enchanted in some way to control the black briars that make up the pits in its chamber.

When Dirk enters they appear simply as spike pits, but once he crosses the gap from the spinning sticks they start to close in behind him. I like to think this is some kind of enchantment spell that is somehow combined with or controlled by the Red Death. Perhaps the dungeon's creator wanted the black briars as a pit trap as they are inescapable once you fall in, coiling around anyone who touches them, but if not controlled they would quickly spread through the whole dungeon and try to strangle everything.

The Black Briars become more animate and aggressive the longer a victim is around them. They start at the first stage and advance one stage every combat round, unless a creature nearby is containing them. Slaying the creature releases the control.

First Stage: The Briars are dormant.
Second Stage: Briars move lazily towards any living thing. Can be jumped over or slashed, but you must make a save to do so during combat.
Third Stage: The Briars gain some amount of intelligence and will move to cut off escape routes. They move faster, you must now sacrifice a turn to avoid.
Fourth Stage: The Briars now make attacks every round, at +1, counting as magic. On a hit, you are entangled and are slowly squeezed and fed upon; 2d6 damage per round until death.

Enchanted Workshop
The workshop is enchanted and has several animate objects (weapons, anvil, statue) that attack Dirk. Not really much to say here- except for the glowing green fire. At a certain point, Dirk goes to it and puts his sword in it, gaining a flaming sword for a short fight with the animate statue. I like the idea of immersing mundane weapons in dungeon elements like this to make them magical or gain an extra power for an attack/few rounds/turns. Also the fire square on the ground is cool too, preventing you from moving, but not much to say about it either.

Whirlwind Room
You're introduced to this room by a whirlwind, which sucks you inside of it. Then within the room, there is a tornado inside with random objects. There isn't many mechanics, here, the only noticeable thing here is the glowing diamond which is a trap. Perhaps the diamond itself is a cursed item that creates the wind.

Stone of Storms - Cursed Treasure
This large gemstone is worth a fortune- at least 30,000c to a standard buyer, and closer to 40,000c for a wise man who recognizes its unique properties. However, it is cursed and there is significant risk to acquiring the gemstone.

The gemstone creates storms around itself, controlling the element of air. Air-based magical spells fail around it and gas or dust is blown apart easily. These storms become more dangerous the larger an area the gem is exposed to- if left outside it will quickly create an endless tornado, with itself in the center of its eye, rooted to one spot. Indoors, or in a bag or chest, the air only swirls around mildly- but even in a small room it causes objects to fly and tumble around. In a room with furniture or weapons, save or be struck by the flying objects. Your movement is halved.

The gem within this dungeon is particular is set in a trap- the recess it is set in has an opening in the floor that will fling whoever tries to reach for it out into a great pit, falling to their death. Similar tricks can be used by those who wish to keep the gemstone from thieves.

Flying Steed
The Flying Steed is a magitech construct of a horse. It levitates through the air once activated. It is not alive and therefore cannot be killed; stats as a warhorse but can only be stropped by true destruction. It can also fly and is very fast, never tires out or drops a rider out of fear, etc.

However, it is also extremely hard to control, bucking and flying wildly through the air. At the speed it travels, it can easily dash its rider against a wall or even the ground. Only a Cavalier of 6th level or higher, or a Fighter of 9th level, can control the horse enough to slow it down, dismount normally, etc. Otherwise its practical a rocket.

If you're riding the steed and are unable to control it, you are safe in a straight line. Make a saving throw to avoid smashing into something if you need to turn, stop, or get off the horse. On failure, you are flung at breakneck speeds and are killed or take serious injury; depending on where you crash.

Cool Electric Black-Knight Dude (3 HD, +4 AC, +2 To-Hit, 1d6+1 Magic Sword, Electric Hazards at a range)
This guy fucks. By stabbing the ground, he can create electric fields that move away from him slowly. These fields deal 2d6 lightning damage to anyone who steps on them, but can be avoided by careful and slow movement. For each round you move towards him, you must either move at 1/3rd of your normal speed or make a save to run without getting shocked. If your character has -1 Agility modifier or worse, you cannot make the jumps required to accomplish this.

Various Undeads
There are several varieties of undead that inhabit this place; from tiny giggling skulls to huge skeletal hands to invisible wraiths that appear before attacking. All of them can be harmed by Dirks sword so we assume they are all some manner of corporeal undead. Isn't much to say for these; other then the skull shape. It could just be artistic license, but the protruding jaws of the skulls give a distinctly monkey-ish impression, as though these are the remnants of some other alien fantasy race that once lived or built the ruins atop the Dragon's Lair.

However I want to make special attention to these wraiths. Their method of killing Dirk in this scene is grabbing him and burying him alive in one of the heavy stone sarcophagi around the room- quite brutal.

Bat Lord (1+2 HD, +1 To-Hit, 1d4+1 bite, bat swarm)
Seemingly connected to or in control of a swarm of bats that try to knock Dirk into pits, this roughly man-sized creature has a loud roar. It may also be a vampire bate, given how it wraps Dirk up while biting him for its death scene.

Magnetic Urn
While not a literal creature, the magnetic urn seems to be a magical or cursed item that inhabits this dungeon. It is filled with golden coins and runs away from the hero- but it also magnetically attracts his sword to it, leaving him briefly defenseless. Interestingly, it isn't clear if the urn itself is magnetic and that explains how it flies around, or if its magnetic ability is an additional thing that helps it disarm invaders to the dungeon.

For this; if you try to make an attack roll while it is adjacent to you with any ferrous metallic weapon (most metal weapons), then make a save or it slips from your hand. Even if you succeed the save, you'll still miss your attack from the strong attractive force.

Lizard King (2+1 HD, -1 To-Hit, +1 AC, 1d6 Scepter Attack)
It's interesting that a creature like this got so much screentime- he doesn't have any magic or special abilities, or is really that threatening to an adventurer, but yet you have to avoid him for a long time while Dirk doesn't have his sword; and he attacks merely by slamming his scepter at you, while giggling. I like his design quite a bit. I also found that picture by searching online his name, instead of just taking a picture from a youtube longplay like I did for the rest of these. It's quite a nice piece.

Even though Dragon's Lair is just a QTE movie-game, Dirk fills up his little backpack with gold from that magnetic urn after beating the Lizard King, which feels like a very OSR/DnD thing to do. I could almost see it as a checkpoint or time when the hero could leave the dungeon with his mission unaccomplished in case he was too wounded or out of torches and the like to keep exploring. It feels very similar to defeating an important monster in a dungeon and then looting their lair afterwards.

Magnetic Crystal Ball
Yet another magnetic & electrical trap. This time, it has the strength to drag in both Dirk's helmet and sword, and begins to fill the room with electrical energy; moving as a zone on the ground that fills up the room. The eye on the top of the throne also fires out electrical energy, perhaps as a method to finish off anyone who just flies over the zone on the floor. I also really like the aesthetics of this room; I'd pay for an animation cel of that background by itself.

For this hazard; a simply saving throw is needed to avoid the trap, with the eye performing an attack roll at +2 against anything that simply levitates over the floor.

Magma Hulks (Stats as Troll- Immune to Fire but no regeneration)
These large creatures are born from the primordial lava and bubbling underground sludge deep underneath the castle dungeon. They are born in an environment filled with fire, so are immune to it, and are big and strong. I'd stat them as slightly modified trolls to keep it simple.

Black Knight (6 HD, +6 AC, +4 To-Hit, 1d6+1 Magic Sword, some spells)
This black knight is a powerful warrior and combatant and also appears to be able to cast some magical spells as well. He seals up Dirk's sword at the beginning of his fight, indicating this magical ability. If you were into more modern D&D edition, I would even argue this guy has Cackle- making his curse last longer each combat round with a laugh as he rides in.

Dragon's Lair
You're in the home stretch. This is the Dragon's Lair itself. It's a large cavernous room with treasure everywhere; the treasure itself is the only real threat here- as if it cascades and makes noise it will wake up the dragon. This is also where the Princess is held; potentially any captive or important NPC could be held there, but in this game it's Princess Daphne. This sphere is inescapable and requires a key to be unlocked. This is also the location of a Magic Sword.

Magic Sword
This is a generic magic sword. It doesn't shoot energy blasts or anything but seems very strong and good at slaying dragons. It can also absorb fire breath- perhaps the sword grants protection against fire or just breath weapons/magic blasts in general.

For stats, I'd make it a +2 Magic Sword- deals 1d8+2 damage and can absorb breath weapons.

Singe (8 HD, +8 To-Hit, +8 AC, Fire Breath)
I like him. Singe is a fairly generic dragon. He's a bit on the small side, but fitting for this type of setting, very oldschool in design. It's hard to pin down exactly how strong he SHOULD be, since he is killed in one hit (as with anything in this game), but kills you with one hit too. You actually spend more time fighting the lizard king dude then the dragon at the end of Dragon's Lair. While more intelligent then an animal, he doesn't seem to talk or cast spells, seeming to be more of an uncannily intelligent predator-type of dragon. His breath weapon is fire and he doesn't have wings so he can't fly.

Anyway, that's the whole game. This took a while to make and was a bit sloppy, but I found it fun to stat up this old cheesy cartoon.

8 Mountain Witch Spells

Art @Ryan Pancoast

[1] Snakebite - 1st level
The caster hold out their hand and a snake flies from it, attempting to bite whoever they are flung at. The target gets a saving throw against the poison. The type of snake is random. The snake will try to make one bite, then just like slither away or do whatever behavior it normally would; its not under the control of the spell caster in any way. This spell also fails automatically if you have an AC of 16 or higher, as the snake just breaks its teeth on your armor.

[2] Let Me Guide You - 1st level
This insidious spell is used by witches, druids, shamans, ferrymen, and anyone else that can take advantage of lost travelers in faraway places. In order for you to use this spell, you must be guiding or leading a group of people who don't know an area or landscape as well as you do. There is no saving throw against this spell, but those with a Wisdom modifier of +2 will always get a funny feeling once this spell is cast and in effect; like they should leave a trail.

During the duration of this spell, no random encounters are rolled, and things are uneasily quiet. The group following you will not notice any significant hazards or delays, even in a place that is said to be difficult to trek.

The caster of the spell can then choose any location within the area they know to leave you, and then they can leave themselves away with you unable to follow. This spell can even do leave people in incredibly dangerous or unusual places; such as the old witch leading you into the center of a group of sleeping giants, or you suddenly find yourself standing on top of a huge pillar of stone 50 feet off the ground with the guide disappeared. This spell can't work on someone twice.

[3] Mountain Oak - 1st level
This spell allows you to stand your feet in the ground and become unmovable. If it be by gravity, storm, or earthquake you become unable to be moved from your spot. You can stand on the tallest spire of rock and not be knocked down by strong rocks hurled at you or powerful winds and so on.

This perilous ability has two flaws- the first is that a shove or push from a person can still knock you down and second, if the rock goes out from under you you will fall either way. Additionally, while under the effect of this spell you receive +2 to all saving throws and ignore the first 2 points of damage you would receive from any source.

[4] Hermitize - 2nd level
This spell is a curse. When cast on you, make a saving throw. If you fail, you must treat your Charisma modifier as -2 and find other people repulsive, needing to live on your own. You must become a hermit- and you can choose to live in any wild or natural place away from others EXCEPT for this mountain where this witch lives. This one is taken.

This curse lasts one year, or until you kill the witch who cast it.

[5] Frozen Fall - 3rd level
This spell must be cast on a creature or object that is in flight. From the casters hands come a powerful spray of frozen slush, which coats the bottom of the flying creature. The bottom of the creature or object is frozen over with a layer of heavy ice, which pulls down on it. The creature must be within range of an arrow, or else the spell can't reach.

Powerful creatures like Dragons or a Winged Terror will not be pulled down by this, just slowed, where as smaller flying creatures will be pulled to the ground and unable to fly or walk, but are still free to attack with their head, tail, wing beats, etc. Creatures brought to the ground this way can slow themselves enough not to take damage, unless if the creature cannot normally fly. Additionally, while frozen by this spell, creatures get -2 AC from being unable to move.

[6] Stonedust - 3rd level
Requires a pouch or handful of finely ground sand which becomes magically enchanted. This spell has two effects; chosen by how they are used. The first is by throwing handful of dust in the air, it will blossom out, multiply, and coat the landscape in a very fine layer like snow. The dust will have the same color as it did as sand, thus creating the illusion of gray snow or fine powder over everything. When the spell is cast, the caster can dictate what will whip up the dust. They can say something as specific as "human" or "werewolf" but not this specific human, or a specific type of werewolf. When the dust is whipped up, it become a choking black cloud over the land, stinging and scratching the throats of everyone who are outside. This deal 1d6 damage per round you are within the sand storm as toxic gas damage AND prevents all spellcasting. Because of the storm itself being made of this sand, it is visible from a far distance and can be used as a beacon or warning from far away.

The second use of this spell requires mixing the dust into water, which becomes a sand-colored oil. The oil is fire retardant and prevents electricity from going through it, but is weak to ice and will dry up and crack if exposed to cold temperatures. Anointing a creature's skin with the oil marks them as "of the earth" and grants resistance to fire and lightning, +4 AC, and +1 damage with unarmed attacks. The anointed being also gains +25% magic resistance, (25% chance to deflect spells) but this effect ends the moment any part of their body stops touching the ground and doesn't return until a fresh casting of this spell.

Finally; the Stonedust liquid can also be quaffed. If drunk, the drinker will have the Stone to Flesh spell cast on them, no save, which automatically wears off after 2d6 years. They reduce their Dexterity by -1d4 points; as some amount of the stone stiffness never really goes away.

[7] Finger of the Mountain - 3rd level
When casting this spell, the magic user must be physically higher up in altitude then the target, at least by a few inches. Otherwise, the spell will be grounded and fail.

The caster creates a bolt of lightning from their finger downwards at their target, dealing 4d8 lightning damage and shoving you back 10 ft. Save for half damage. The spell creates a loud thunderbolt and as such it will draw in a random encounter after being used.

[8] Rein the End - 4th level
This spell allows the user to create and control an avalanche. This can be a snow avalanche, the most common, or a rock slide or mud slide, which functions similarly. This spell always begins with an inhuman cry, which shakes the mountains and acts as the only warning this spell has begun. The avalanche created will flow down the mountain and can be steered and made more or less aggressive. It can also split apart, such as to avoid targets, or concentrated to bury one area in a massive blanket of snow. It cannot travel up, and the spell ends when the snow has reached the ground and settles.

Anyone buried by an avalanche must save or be knocked unconscious. Those with a Constitution modifier of +2 or better an ignore this save. Once buried, the victim has 2d6 turns worth of air before they suffocate, and need to be dug out.