Catholic priests tirelessly feeding the poor and downtrodden. Police officers and soldiers fallen in the line of duty. Chivalric knights fighting for justice. Dogs jumping into burning buildings to save their masters. What do all these people have in common? They are considered heroes. And most also consider they have a one way ticket to heaven.
Saturday, January 30, 2021
Heaven's Riders
Catholic priests tirelessly feeding the poor and downtrodden. Police officers and soldiers fallen in the line of duty. Chivalric knights fighting for justice. Dogs jumping into burning buildings to save their masters. What do all these people have in common? They are considered heroes. And most also consider they have a one way ticket to heaven.
Thursday, January 28, 2021
[Class] Destructive Star Physician
This class's name was randomly generated by this random generator, which I was smitten by.
Destructive Star Physician
HD- d6
Max AC- 13 / Minimum Hit-Points- 4
You are a doctor, but not just any doctor. You know about the Others, the star children, the Great Old Ones. To you, human biology, and indeed the biology of any living creature, is objectively inferior to the biology of these otherworldly astral beings. As much as possible, you want to stretch the limits of what a living thing can be. You hurt people pretty much as much as you help them.
You are a healer first and foremost, and can heal people using first aid and medical items. You can use two healing items in a downtime turn (10 minute period) at level 3, three healing items at level 6, and four healing items at level 9. Healing dice are split up among multiple patients and/or damage types.
Your knowledge of anatomy also grants you a bonus to combat. You gain +1 damage on hit with all attacks at levels 4 and 8.
While you are a doctor and physician, your main goal lies in the ascension of raw, mundane flesh into that of the star beings and others beyond. Starting at level 2, you may experiment on any willing (or unconscious) party member. You may only experiment once per level, but can experiment on the same party member multiple times every time you level up, if you want to make a freakshow.
At levels 2 thru 4, roll a d4 on the table below.
At levels 5 thru 7, roll a d6 on the table below.
At levels 8 and 9, roll a d8 on the table below.
At level 10 and above, roll a d10 on the table, or pick the result if you're within your laboratory.
Star-Physician Experiment Table
[1] The Doctor loses 1d3 Wisdom, the Patient loses 1d6 Charisma or goes partially insane.
[2] Patient takes 1d8 points of acid damage. This patient cannot roll this result a second time.
[3] Patient gains 1d3 points to a random physical stat (Str, Dex, Con) but loses -1d6x10% of their remaining life expectancy.
[4] Patient is healed from all wounds, and gains +2 permanent maximum HP. The patient is also now host to several alien parasites; they must eat an extra ration per day.
[5] Patient is immune to all earthly diseases and ghoul paralysis. However, they must save vs death if struck with a silver weapon.
[6] Patient rolls on a mutation table. If the mutation does not have any beneficial effects, reroll.
[7] Doctor has removed an important organ from the Patient- heart, lungs, or pancreas. The patient gets +2 to all saving throws, but if the organ is destroyed outside of their body they will die.
[8] Patient now has a poisonous bite that deals 1d6 damage on a failed save. If rolled a again, it is now poison spit. If rolled again, poisonous blood.
[9] Roll a random Damage Type (1d8 for damage types here) OR a random element. The patient now takes half damage from that damage type. The Patient is also now an Other and does not "detect" as their original race or type of being.
[10] Patient is now ageless, and appears stuck at whatever age they were when this experiment took place. The patient also has a strange symbol tattoo'd on their body, and their mind is filled with a Terrible Knowledge.
At 10th level, you become an Astral Healer and can astral project your consciousness at will. This allows you to seek things and see the unseen, but every time you do the DM will add +1d6% to a DOOM tracker hidden from you. Every time you astrally project, there is a d% chance your spirit will be taken by something out there and your body will die without a soul.
Tuesday, January 26, 2021
20 Monster Modifiers
Vagueposting- Optional Ramblings about Medical Items
This is a direct follow-up to The Healing System. This is a Vagueposting article, meaning it is very long, kinda pointless, and was posted separately as to not muddy up the actual rules and mechanics post itself with a long ugly text wall at the end. You have been warned.
Ideas and Digressions about each type of Healing Item
Sharp damage is generic. Bandages are for sure the easiest item to
carry around. They're also the easiest to improvise- anyone can just
rip up a dirty shirt for a lower healing value. I would also totally
let elves and the like make some bandages out of woven grass or
fallen leaves. For this reason, I hardly consider them a recovery
item at all and would almost just wrap up the both most basic damage
types (sharp and blunt) to just be 'freebies' you can heal at any
time- splints are just a hard object + a bit of string to make a
basic splint so it's also pretty simple. Exchanging time + safety for
healing is a good enough trade off without needing to bother with
keeping track. However resource management is important in a dungeon
crawler, and I like the idea of getting magical bandages at some
point. Plus there is also the psychological factor of having regular
“bandages” you bring from home being better, healing 1d6, where
as improvised bandages healing only 1d3 or 1d4, even if they are
pretty much infinite. This means players will feel like they're
running out of the more optimal healing even if it doesn't actually
change that much for the game.
Blunt damage is pretty similar to broken bones. If you wanted to make it more “realistic”, only allow the use of the limb after its been splinted, but the damage can't be restored with basic items. Another idea is to just fold this into bandages, since it's pretty simple physical damage- you wrap up limbs and the skull when it is heavily bruised or after a nasty fall, as splints don't work as well as well for body parts that aren't straight, long bones like an arm or leg. Splints are also really easy to make in the field, just a bit of rope or a bandage + a random straight hard object on the ground like a bone or even a dulled sword. I also like the idea of using casts in the form of plasters that require water, but few people keep track of water rations. How else could you make a cast? Use wooden bracers for a couple of downtime turns to carve them- requires wood and 1d4 turns of effort but heals 1d8 or more? This is the type of injury that is less easy to explain with the first aid idea of it healing, but could be useful for those with a more rulings-over-rules mindset. Every broken bone or injury could be unique.
Ointments are one of my favorite healing ideas or solutions. You can pretty easily imagine fire, lightning, and acid damage burning and scorching the skin. Ointment makes perfect sense. It can be carried in a tub and is probably one of the more expensive healing items. Improvisation is my favorite for this one; you can rub cooled ash from a wood fire into the wound for its alkaline properties, 1d3 for being improvised. You can also make your own ointment by boiling monster fat- I'd give this 1d4 or perhaps healing equal to the monsters HD, but there's a pretty nice opportunity to force a mutation roll for this. Also since water and water magic often have healing connotations, I'd let it heal 1d2 or just one hit point if you spend a turn running fresh water from a spring or fountain onto these kinds of wounds, but if you prefer water MAGIC as healing then keep this for specific spells or class powers.
Cold damage being healed by warming up is one of my favorites for thematics. I like it for two reasons; the first is the sort of “old wives tale” vibe of a bowl of chicken noodle soup actually curing a cold, and two because it fits with the theme of surviving in a cold place. Most cold damage will be coming to you in cold lands with snow and cold creatures and blizzards and ice magicians. You need to keep careful stock of your firewood, your bourbon, your black pepper. Oh, by the way, all of those can help restore cold. Good alcohol and spicy food help warm you up just as much as a blanket and a fire. Of course this is still limited by restoring items; 1d6 per turn sat around a fire with a limit of counting once per person; so a Sage can't start four fires around someone or something- that's not the idea. Cold is a slow and steady killer in that regard; not like a bleeding wound which you can keep piling bandages on to. I like that sort of asymmetry in the damage types and treatment methods. Spicy foods or alcohol can be used too and would restore 1d4 for both, except really good Dwarf alcohol can restore more. I also had the thought that Dwarves can just restore any damage type by drinking beer which fits their character but might be a little strong since it's the same as a health potion, so making it just cold damage works well and fits that sort of cold mountain dwarf aesthetic if you go for that.
Miasma is another great one. This is where the damage types start to dive more into that “mythical realism” idea I want to push so hard. Miasma is caused by foul air- the rotting or diseased living things or even foul smelling substances in the earth like sulfur cause harm. In this case, not disease but shortness of breath and toxic fumes. It's the medieval fantasy version of gas warfare. The idea is that it can be cured by smelling nice things- the same as the plague doctor with a perfumed beak. Miasma would be hard to cure except if you consider perfume and sweet smelling things to be the cure; huffing a handful of recently clipped flowers would restore 1d4, where as a vial of aromatic extract or healer's perfume would be 1d6 hit points for being more expensive and exclusive. Simply being in a place with fresh air- away from a city and out in the mountains and country, also restores 1d4 per day. Good for fitting in with the ideas about health and disease as mythical people might think of it.
Poison is pretty simple, and is relatively common. Most of the time though I think antidotes just stop poisons as opposed to restore damage done by them, but if we're going with this system, then poison can be removed from the body which counts as healing. Emetic drugs work as a method to induce vomiting- which I've seen (mostly in Eastern fantasy?) as a way to remove impurities or poisons from the body. It's not just the drug, the act of vomiting itself removes the toxin. I like to imagine in the fantasy/medievalist mindset that the stomach has the power to concentrate poisons in the blood that can be spewed out, which leads to black bile and the like. So an emetic drug to induce vomiting also concentrates toxins better. Some kind of plant or herb that causes you to vomit would be 1d6, eating some moldy bread or spoiled meat is 1d4, and just sticking a finger in your mouth to throw up would be like 1d3 or less.
Terror. For terror- I wore my inspiration on my sleeve. I stole Terror/Mortal Terror status effect straight from Sekiro. I really liked this mechanic; when fighting ghostly enemies, there is a status effect bar in the typical soulslike style where it slowly fills and when it is filled, it causes the status effect. Mortal Terror has the effect of instantly killing you, you “die of fright”, regardless of what your health bar looks like. I liked this idea a lot to ground the player characters a bit in this fantasy world, and make the undead feel more fantastical. One issue with this is players will feel like their characters are being controlled too much by the DM- and not in the form of mind control. Like if you want to be a badass warrior you don't want to hear how he get scared. But the idea here is it's supernatural, which I kind of like in terms of undead. Like even if you're brave you start shaking, your hair turns white, etc. And if you get too scared your heart will stop and you'll die. Terror is also a damage type that is a bit harder to cure- pacifying drugs is the main type. Lavender/calming elixirs and tranquilizers would work. I don't know if taking a nap really makes sense here- if it's fear you'd probably just have a screaming nightmare, but at the same time forced people to sleep could be cool. Pacifying drugs are 1d6, lavender sprigs are 1d4. Maybe singing a happy song is 1d3. I personally like the idea of a music box or something like that being used as opposed to a group activity, since it's an “item”, but it's kind of a minor thing.
Wasting damage is caused by draining. I like to imagine death spells, the touch of undead, and blood draining enemies, and being starved as being its causes. The issue with this damage type is it's a bit of an overlap with terror and/or cold when it comes to what could be the main damage type of the undead or “dark magic” sort of thing. I like keeping them separate because it's more authentic to the fantastical realism- and it's a body more “physical” and noticable then something like negative energy or level drain. I do like energy dream but I feel like it could be roped into wasting, but it could also be separate for a more spiritual feel. Eating a ration restores 1d6 wasting damage, a snack is 1d4, a feast is 1d8 or better. Maybe better ingredients have a semi-magical amount of restoration. You could also improvise this with poor quality or raw ingredients- if you're dying of hunger just killing a squirrel and eating it raw because you don't have time to cook it and have a meal makes sense to me. Wasting is more like a drain of your “life force” energy, so you could also make it restored by food, sleep, sex, etc.
Thursday, January 21, 2021
The Healing System
Addition is faster then subtraction, so combat is not slowed down. The only potential problem with this system is that somebody could make an error and not notice they went over their Hit Points- but unlike a subtracting HP total, an earlier mistake won't mess you up for several rounds in advance. I'd write each injury individually, which gives you a nice little history of your misadventures, but you could run several running totals for each damage type if you like. You can also keep a total Hit Point counter to save time and easily tell when the next hit kills you.
In many ways, this system actually speeds up combat. Now you can tell instantly what wounds are killing you. It also helps for special powers or abilities- the character who is resistant to bludgeoning damage just writes half the value down on their sheet, instead of doing subtraction twice. The werewolf can regenerate 1d6 hit points every round- except the silver wounds, which are now separate from their hit point total so you won't get confused.
Extra – What about Health Potions?
All health potions are “Potions of Healing”- no minor or major or grand or whatever. They restore all your damage, instantly. You can't use other healing methods to heal in combat. This may be too strong- but if you make Potions of Healing rarer it would be have the same impact. You can also make health potions that heal specific types of damage, or an amount of damage, if you want to fiddle with rules more. Personally I like the idea of specific cures that can be used in combat- like a rubber-blood potion that seals up all your bleeding wounds, or a potion of liquid warmth which cures your cold damage and stuff. Doing individual amounts like traditional d8 healing potions or healing spells would mean that different damage types would have to have a sort of set order, or letting the players pick what they are healing. I feel like this works too- drink the potion to cure internal damages, pour on the skin to cure cuts and bruises, etc. So it's not a huge stretch to let a healing potion heal whatever damage types you want.
I also wrote this concept up in this alchemy ruleset- but I also like the idea of cheap or weaker health potions with a short shelf life- tonics. The idea if players can make or produce them on an adventure, to fit with the theme of being a magical healer, and to give magical healing for in-combat stuff, but they expire and can't be saved adventure to adventure to prevent the problem of stockpiling too many (or by contrast- never using them because they want to save them until later).
Wednesday, January 20, 2021
Post where I recommend a bunch of shitty itch.io games
So yesterday's post was kinda negative, so let's make this one positive instead. All these games are free or pay-what-you-want, so you don't think this post is advertising! They're also not all technically from itch.io, but you get what I mean. If you're here still waiting for (good) tabletop content, come back tomorrow. The 21st, I told you. I promise.
Anger Foot
This game is a lot of fun. Short and sweet; it's a very Hotline Miami-esque FPS, all about fast action and slaughtering enemies. My only complaint is the beginning part of the last level; way too hard. It is total bullshit. You'll know it when you see it. The game itself is like 45 minutes long btw, so this is perfect if you want some fast paced action.
JARS
This game is all about a young Victor Frankenstein- it's a strategy/puzzle game with some progression between levels. Basically, you break Jars on shelves to open up minions, gadgets, OR reveal enemies who will attack the caskets, which you must defend. It's great, has a few hours of content, and is still in early access. The artstyle is also gorgeous- very Don't Starve esque, and totally adorable. I'm watching this game's development and may even purchase a full and polished release; it's right up my alley.
Brogue
Brogue appears as a fairly standard ASCII roguelike clone, but it is anything but. I'm also cheating here, as this isn't technically an itch.io game- don't get confused. There are some Borgue MODS and alternate versions over on there, but I'm referring to the main one, found here.
Brogue is a surprisingly nice-looking game with some fantastic design. Basically, think of a generic Roguelike- but with no level ups or character races or classes. Your character is a generic adventurer. You advance in the game by finding potions that permanently improve your strength- health potions also increase your maximum health as well as fully heal you, giving you a strong tactical usage for them. It's design is something I find very appealing in the realm of unique tabletop game ideas; I feel like I've had to have talked about this one on my blog somewhere before; maybe for a scheduled post in the future? I'm not sure- but Brogue is just fantastic. Don't be put off by the fairly generic picture above; it makes EVER pixel of that ASCII art shine! I might even like it more then the de-facto Roguelike in DCSS. It's just that good.
HitOthers
The final game- a really weird one. Made by the band Bullerslug back in the early '10s, you are let loose in a bar with a time limit of one song to either find the three keys and escape (the lame ending) or find the gear and play a new song (cool ending) while hitting others. I remember first seeing this game in a random streamer's indie game collection stream like 5 years ago, then suddenly stumbling upon it again after forgetting the name, and here we are.
I actually really like the design of this game. Basically your health and stats are one in the same; you drink various color-coded alcohols to increase your attack, health, and speed while taking damage reduces them at a similar rate. You mash the mouse button to HIT OTHERS and are supposed to be beating people up to either increase your score and/or get the items they are carrying. The second quest or ending of this game allows you to play any song that you have collected from hitting somebody in the bar and taking the album from them when the countdown at the end of the HIT OTHERS song is over. This means you can basically listen to whatever songs you want by these artists in this game; so you could think of this game a bit like an interactive album with a small challenge to unlock the songs! Fair warning, the game is a little buggy and fucks up your wrist since you have to mash the mouse button to hit, and the mouse sensitivity is all weird giving some strain for playing it. It's still kind of a fun little beat-em-up with a unique atmosphere.
However, the most interesting thing about this game now, and why I'm posting about it here, is that the game's official website is now offline. So is the band's website. As far as I am aware, the band has only produced one album, (Cheer up, goth!) which is the one in this game. I don't know anything about the people in this band when it was about; did they break up, or did some of them die? Are they still around, but just playing in the underground Amsterdam music circles and are off the grid? I have no idea. But this game remains- and there is a literal band on the stage in this game. Not only has this game outlived its creators but, in a way, it's a time capsule to the music they did make. From making a game to advertise your music, to the game being all the remains. Long after the creators are dead, and all of us are dead for that matter, the band in this game remains, the party never ending. While you could say this is true in every form of media, a game where someone's art is continued on gives me the feeling of its own mysticism.
Tuesday, January 19, 2021
Post where I complain about the updates to a shitty itch.io game
So you ever played Juice Galaxy; formerly Juice World? It was one of my favorite "weird" games. Totally free game, physics based, with weird and wonderful things to see. Back when I first played it, it was just a few updates in; the only real "thing" to do was to find the secret ultimate buster sword and defeat the one boss. Later on, the updates grew more and more. The game's name was changed to Juice Galaxy, which while I don't like 100% it makes sense, as you can now explore new planets or worlds. The game has a great soft vibe, nice music, great progression (when you get to the point where you can levitate as long as you want is a great turning point) and is just pretty fun to check back in on every few months. Which was what I was doing.
But then, the newer updates came. I don't like em. Not to sound like a "Boomer", but sometimes simpler is better.
The new game has items with stats that randomly drop from monsters and in random places. These pieces of gear certainly give the game more progression, but it slows down the game as now you're checking the stats to things. Originally, there was no inventory system- you just explored the world and carried what you wanted in your hands. It lacked depth sure, and you could lose your weapons forever, but it was more like an adventure. You just picked up things you found, a new weapon or whatever, and tried it out. You didn't have to stop and look at the stats.
Secondly; the new ability to customize your character with new hats on demand from the inventory is fine, but I dislike adding stats to it. Before, you found these cosmetic items as part of your adventures. You talk to the farmer and he gives you a straw hat when you become "friends", it just happens, it's part of the story. Now that line and the subsequent payoff doesn't mean anything, because it's just about stats.
I think you could have had a similar feeling by having a few new things in the center area (graveyard/courtyard where you fall in the beginning after you escape the school), such as a magic mirror that lets you change your appearance items once you unlock them. Maybe Mr.Fox, who doesn't do anything as far as I am aware except give you some lore or juice if you kill him, could spawn any item you have already found in the game at least once at the cost of juice, explained as him going out in the world and finding it for you. I think that would solve the potential problem of losing rare and powerful items, as well as act as a secondary form of progression beyond your basic stats improved by juice- and give you an extra way to spend juice.
Third; the opportunity costs of these changes also bugs me. The developer has been adding stuff like new worlds and bosses, which is great and exactly what I wanted to see in this game, but hasn't been changing up the main mechanics to focus on a mostly useless RPG progression system. Giving the player a better method to attack enemies in flight (be able to do damage while ramming into things would be great!) would be much more enriching to the game then adding in random stats to items. Of course, there's no reason they can't do both, but the fact they're adding this kind of stuff makes me think that the core gameplay, physics based combat is sort of "finished" and set in stone and now they're working on tweaks and stuff. That's what I think the biggest issue is.
Anyway, no idea wtf the point of this post was, as nobody here has played this game or will. I just felt like complaining about it. I liked how the game was before, but it was always a simple, weird, experimental thing. I wasn't expecting it to cater to me perfectly, nor was I going to follow it (or buy it lol) as the years went on, but I feel strangely slighted that my favorite bullshit itch.io weird game changed in a way I don't like. Just wanted to get this off my chest.
Also also if you want this blog to start posting good posts again come back on the 21st lol
Monday, January 18, 2021
Gods-Above-Gods
Fix that picture in your mind. The orchard of the universe. Now imagine the woodsman. He whistles as he walks with his axe and snare traps, picking between the trees at his whim. He may fell one or plant one anew, each tree is just one of many. The woodsman does not only understand the orchard and its purpose; he is its master.
Art @Marcos Lopez |
AC- 500
Morale- N/A
Attacks- (Always Hits) Boundless Harpoons at 100d100 Damage
Abilities- Aboveness, Leviathans, Boundless, That-Which-Is-Greater
HD- 100,000
AC- 500
Morale- N/A
Attacks- (+500 To-Hit) Killing Sword at Infinite Damage (any type)
Abilities- Aboveness, Kill, Unlimited Chaining, Flush Armor, That-Which-Struggles
AC- 500
Morale- 10 (Infinite)
Attacks- (+500 To-Hit) Staff of Absorption at 100d100, Hood of Consumption at 100d100
Abilities- Aboveness, Infinite Collection, Maw of Consumption, Mirrored Thoughts, That-Which-Wants
HD- 100,000
AC- Infinite
Morale- N/A
Attacks- (+500 To-Hit) Touch at 100d100 (Level Drain, Stat Drain, Ultimate Corrosion)
Abilities- Aboveness, Drought, Failure, Level Drain, That-Which-Ends